Rachel Callahan

What I Learned at BlogHer.

August 10, 2011August 10, 2011 Rachel Callahan "Deep" Thoughts by Rachel, A Bit More Vulnerable Than I Usually Am, Blogging: the therapy., Blogher, I'm a Blog Geek, I'm a Glutton for Adventure, Just My Luck

I decided to attend my third BlogHer at the last minute to go to one event: The Voices of the Year Reception. Even though I wasn’t chosen as a speaker (thank goodness because my nerves couldn’t have handled it), being an Honoree was so exciting, and I had promised myself last year that if I were ever chosen, I wouldn’t miss it.

The reason why I made that promise is that last year it was absolutely magical. Curated by Kirtsy, there were about a dozen amazingly creative events and opportunities going on at once. But the one that stood out was how they chose to memorialize the Voices of the Year honorees: they had commissioned works of art to be created for each individual blog post (over 80 pieces). They were all displayed in art gallery format, portraying our love of blogging in a different and fabulous way.

What was even more special to me personally is that all of the artwork was auctioned off to help my state and it’s neighbors recover from the BP Oil Spill.

I remember mourning for my fellow Alabama blogger, Country-Fried Mama, who had been chosen as an honoree but couldn’t attend at the last minute due to medical reasons. The moment was so amazing, the artwork portraying her post so touching – it was a tragedy for her to miss it.

…Which is what made my final decision to attend this year.

This year’s Voices of the Year reception was to be curated by a different organization, and the only description of the event on the BlogHer site was one sentence that started with “There’s no way we’ll be able to top last year’s event, but…”

So I tried to downplay my expectations. It’s probably a good assumption that there won’t be personally commissioned artwork depicting our blog posts.

But even before the reception arrived, I had an awesome day at BlogHer. I learned a lot, I got many wheels spinning in my head with regards to my blog, and I got to hang out with my awesome blogging friends Rhoda, Lisa, Heather, Angela, and Kate. I really enjoyed myself, despite my last minute planning.

But I was really waiting with anticipation for Friday night.

The Voices of the Year posts that were read at the Keynote were moving as always. I laughed, I cried, I laughed, and I cried again. They were fabulous, and the experience was one I’ll always remember.

As it ended, they announced the reception, which is where all of the rest of the Voices of the Year were honored last year.

However, this year, there was good food, but there was no artwork, and not even a single mention that there were any other Voices of the Year honorees besides the readers.

Nada.

The fact that I had traveled 2,000 miles to not be mentioned made me giggle. To signify the momentous occasion, my friend and fellow honoree Kate and I quickly snapped a photo with the backdrop – at least we’d have that.

I could have been disappointed, but I really wasn’t – at all.

If I hadn’t chosen to come,

…Chris and I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to fly alone together for the first time in our ten years of marriage, which was unbelievably fun and romantic.

…We wouldn’t have gotten to have a magical date on Saturday, biking on Coronado, walking the Gaslight district, and in general reconnecting after a hectic year of having a new baby.

…We wouldn’t have gotten to see San Diego from this vantage point:

…Or this one:

…and Chris wouldn’t have had the opportunity to have what he definitively awarded as the best run of his life, 12 miles down the beaches and around the city of San Diego.

The truth is:

The reward of blogging is not awards or recognition.

The reward of blogging is the opportunities and perspectives that it gives me and my family.

…We do things we wouldn’t otherwise ever do, like take a last minute trip to San Diego, or perhaps make a bouquet of meat flowers.

…My kids have a carefully and thoroughly documented journal of their life – they will get to enjoy reading and re-reading every crazy, kooky, and hilarious thing they ever did, at least until their jaded adolescent years when they will roll their eyes at the mention of the word “blog”.

…It allows Chris’ Aunt Kitty and Uncle Leo, who are basically another set of grandparents for our kids, to be a part of our everyday life even though they live four hours away.

…It has taught me how to appreciate the mundane, and even the nasty, awkward, smelly, disgusting, and revolting parts of life.

There. Pep talk done. That feels better. And with renewed humility, I’ve already registered for BlogHer 2012.

The Grandparent Effect.

August 9, 2011April 22, 2012 Rachel Callahan A Day in the Life, Blogher, Just My Luck, Newbornities

Kids.

You send them to the Grandparents for a few days, and you miss ‘em like crazy.

You can’t WAIT to pick them up, knowing that they’ll run to you, jump into your arms, and hug you, showering their undying affection upon you.

Then you arrive, and you are quickly reminded of The Grandparent Effect.

It’s not purposeful on the Grandparent’s part, but any child being the center of attention and running the joint for a few days can’t help but curdling into the most spoiled of states.

Their attitudes smell even worse than those sippy cups of milk that you find underneath the sofa – the ones that you have to shake over the sink with a vehement force to make the solid lump of milk turn loose and jiggle it’s putrid way down the drain, all while you attempt mashing it up with a fork to help it squeeze through.

When kids under the influence of The Grandparent Effect arrive back into real life where Mommy has to do other things besides playing all day…like, say, go to the grocery store or, heaven forbid, take a bath, their jiggly curdledness shakes loose on a regular basis.

They pout. They whine. They fall, severely ungracefully, from their perch atop their Cherished Grandchildren Thrones.

Fortunately, I brought Ali enough BlogHer swag to almost completely counteract The Grandparent Effect.

But Noah – well, he got much less loot.

And he is officially now old enough to experience, for the first time ever, The Grandparent Effect.

He came home with a newly learned expression of curdled disgust when I don’t do exactly what he desires.

It starts out like this…

Then, if I’m not compliant, it progresses to this…

And then, if I still choose to disobey, I receive it.

The Ultimate Look of Shun.

Menacing, isn’t he?

Even Jiggly and Curdled and under the complete influence of The Grandparent Effect, he still makes me want to kiss those big, fat, angry lips.

My Break From BlogHer.

August 8, 2011July 21, 2020 Rachel Callahan Blogher, I embarrass myself just for your amusement., I'm a Glutton for Adventure, I'm a Professional Sleepwalker., Just My Luck, Pop Post, Popular Posts

I have been known to break my nose whilst blogging.

I have also been known to visit the emergency room at wee hours due to sleepwalking injuries.

I like sticking to a theme.

Which is why, I suppose, I took this weekend as an opportunity to break my nose, while sleepwalking, while at a blogging conference.

Friday night. It had been a full day of BlogHer, and I was excited for a night of deep sleep in preparation for my San Diego Date Saturday with Chris.

We settled down for bed, and I fell asleep before Chris made it back from brushing his teeth.

It was glorious experience to inhale the deep aroma of sleep.

Until about 1 AM.

At which time I dreamed that Noah was running toward a balcony edge to the left of the bed.

Naturally, I jumped up and sprinted toward him, doing my Mommy job of saving him from all danger…

Which is when I discovered how close the wall was to my side of the bed.

THWAP.

I crushed my nose and my left knee into the wall.

…which woke me up enough to remember that Noah couldn’t walk yet, certainly couldn’t run, and also happened to be 2,000 miles away.

Chris didn’t move, being quite used to wives that go bump in the night.

I crawled back into bed and fell asleep, albeit a bit damaged.

Then came 2 AM.

I dreamed some combination of Ali running toward a cliff and being on an intense search for The Deathly Hallows.

Naturally, I jumped out of bed and sprinted toward her.

Which is when I was reminded how close the wall was to my side of the bed.

THWAP.

I also discovered that I run much faster at 2 AM than I do at 1 AM.

The pain in my nose (and my knee) created tears – the kind that naturally spring forth from sheer agony, not from crying. I sat down on the corner of the bed and let out my first whimper, considering the weighty reality that I had just managed to run into the same wall twice in one night.

This did not bode well for my 2AM to 8AM sleep shift.

I whimpered again.

I felt my nose. I heard a crunchy sound. I was reminded of my favorite childhood cereal.

It was clear that my nose couldn’t withstand that side of the bed anymore.

I nudged Chris.

“Wha…what’s wrong?”

“I can’t sleep on this side of the bed anymore. I’ve sleptrun into the wall two times, and I broke my nose the second time.”

“Oh. Okay. I’ll swap sides with you.”

He rolled over to my side and resumed snoring peacefully, in no danger of breaking his nose against the clearly hazardous wall.

I moved to Chris’ side of the bed. Obviously, I couldn’t sleep. My nose was throbbing, I was possibly in shock (okay probably not), and, most disturbing, I was on the wrong side of the bed.

And so my mind began spinning…

2:05 AM: I always thought feng shui was feng crap. This is not true. The design of my sleeping environment is so important that it very well may keep me from accidentally offing myself one day.

a. I need a runway next to my bed. No walls can be within five feet, and blinking lights need to be added to all surrounding surfaces.

b. No sharp edges on any bedroom furniture can be tolerated.

c. You know what would be perfect? A padded cell.

2:12 AM: It helps to already know that little can be done for broken noses. You’re not going to get me with your out of state 50% insurance coverage, Blue Cross Blood Suckers!

2:16 AM: It is nice to be rooming with one’s husband. If this had happened my first year at BlogHer and I’d had to ask my I-Just-Met-Her roommate if she would kindly mind swapping sides of the bed with me to prevent the crushing of my nose for the third time in one night, it might have been slightly embarrassing, aside from taking a bit longer to explain.

2:18 AM: Could I petition for a new Americans With Disabilities Act ordinance that prohibits hotel walls from being within five feet of beds? Because I singlehandedly prove that sleepwalking is a disability.

2:22 AM: I am so proud to know that my husband no longer doubts my credibility when I tell him that I’ve severely injured myself in my sleep. Last time, I had to show him the blood streaming down my arm before he quit telling me to get back in bed and go to sleep. This time, I received his complete and immediate acceptance.

2:36 AM: Maybe too much acceptance. He sure is sleeping peacefully over there.

2:39 AM: One should never play with their broken nose while laying in bed and pondering their situation. The sound of tiny particles cracking and grinding is not healthy for one’s nose, one’s pain level, or one’s mental stability.

2:48 AM: My last sleepwalking injury was saving Ali from certain falling, as well. Obviously, I have issues with small children running in high places. Noah, don’t do it. I’m likely to plummet to my death in the attempt to protect you, and that’s a weighty guilt for you to carry for the rest of your life.

2:51 AM: Although a broken nose is quite painful at 2:51 AM, also achy are my neck and shoulders, now most certainly needing an adjustment. Apparently, hitting the wall at high speeds with one’s nose is not good for alignment.

2:52 AM: The knee rash from multiple contacts with the wall is also bothersome. Which is pretty petty at this point.

3:01 AM: I can’t sleep on the wrong side of the bed. Which is worse – not sleeping for the rest of the night, or risking a third injury?

3:09 AM: Not sleeping.

And so I tapped Chris again.

“Wha..what’s wrong?”

“I can’t sleep on your side of the bed. I need you to swap back with me.”

“Okay.”

He rolled back over and continued sleeping hazardlessly. He has no idea how good he’s got it.

E-MEALZ Giveaway!

August 5, 2011August 5, 2011 Rachel Callahan Giveaways and Contests

I want to be a good couponer, sale-paperer, and meal planner, but I’m just not. I have trouble making the time for it, and when I do think about it, I can’t find my sale papers, or never remember to actually use my coupons, even if I have them in my hand at the register.

(You know what’s annoying? When you get to your car and realize you have to set down your coupons to unlock the car doors. I DESPISE MYSELF.)

Anytime I complain about my lack of the meal-planning gene, One of my friends preaches to me about the amazing benefits of E-MEALZ. I was interested, but never got around to signing up. So when E-MEALZ offered to let me try it (and give one of you a chance to give it a whirl), I was totally for it.

Basically, E-MEALZ does all the work of maximizing the sales for me. They take what’s on sale at Publix (they have other grocery store plans as well, but Publix is the one in my area), match it to very simple recipes, and give me a meal plan, recipes, and grocery list.

It’s awesome!

They actually provide recipes and a grocery list for SEVEN meals a week, but since I don’t cook nearly seven times a week, I’m also glad that on the shopping list, they reference each item back to which meal it’s for, so that I can easily highlight the items for the meals I plan to prepare. However, I love all of the choices of the different meals – it makes it easy to please my family!

I’ve been using their plan for a couple of weeks, and the dishes I’ve made from it have been delicious. The shopping list is great – it’s sorted by store area, which is much easier than my usual haphazard as-it-comes-to-my-mind list. And, of course, the added benefit of maximizing the sales is even better! The money they save by doing all of that work for me more than pays for it’s price, at only $1.25 a week.

In addition to the grocery store options, they have meal plans for differing dietary needs. They have plans based around Weight Watchers points, gluten free, low carb, low fat, and portion control. We went with the portion control to try to fit it best into our calorie counting diet, and it fit perfectly!

So if you’d like to win a free three month subscription to E-MEALZ, leave a comment on this post!

You can earn up to four extra entries by:

Liking E-MEALZ on Facebook OR following them on Twitter.
Tweet, blog, OR Facebook about this giveaway
Subscribe to OR Follow my blog
Follow me on Twitter OR Facebook

(be sure to leave separate comments for your extra entries.)

Best of luck! This giveaway is open until Monday, August 15th. The winner will be randomly selected and posted on my giveaway winners page on Tuesday, August 16th.

If you would like to go ahead and join E-MEALZ, click here. (Don’t worry – if you win, it will just go as a credit on your account to pay for the next three months.)

Good luck!!

Disclosure: I received one free month of E-MEALZ service in order to be able to review this product. I was not compensated for my opinions, and they are always my own.

Christmas in July

August 4, 2011August 3, 2011 Rachel Callahan A Day in the Life, I'm a Glutton for Adventure, Kids: The Experience.

Way back in the dark ages of December, when I knew that a baby brother and the turmoil that would be sure to follow was imminent, I bought a Gingerbread House and Gingerbread Tree kit to make with Ali – one last hurrah of uninterrupted Mommy/Daughter QT.

We made the house four days before Noah’s arrival, Ali using her parentally-inherited anal-retentiveness in pattern-making and decor.

She was, rightfully, proud of her delicious creation…which ended up taking a trip with her in the middle of the night to Gramamma and Pop’s house so that we could go to the hospital.

The tree never got made, so it sat in our pantry, lonely and dejected for seven months.

Every now and then, Ali would see the box and ask to make it. I, with my hands full of baby and dreading the stale gingerbread disgust, would put her off.

Finally, last week, she asked at the right time – during Noah’s morning nap. Plus, I knew that Chris and I were going to be leaving a week later (today!!) to go to San Diego, and so I again found myself wanting to get in some quality time with her.

And so, we pulled out that now-antiquated box.

I mixed the icings and prepared our work area…surely we could make a tree that looked something like the ones on the box, right?

I started out with the icing first, and quickly realized that our tree would look NOTHING like the box.

Naturally, I let Ali take over so that it looked like her bad ice job and not mine.

But she was proud of our Wicked-Witch-Of-The-West-Melting-Tree, and that’s all that mattered.

(I swear we do wear other things than pajamas at our house…or at least we do right before we leave the house and right after we get back.)

She added the ornaments, eating as many of those stale, decayed candies as she added to our creation.

Hopefully old candy isn’t known to be a Botulism carrier or anything.

When all was finished, she let me take a few pictures of our impressive creation,

…and then immediately began to eat the awful thing.

Of course, she wanted me to join her in our hard-earned dessert. And I, being the good Mom that I am, braved up and bit into one of those nastified ancient cookies.

It was about as tasty as eating a piece of petrified dog poo remoistened by stagnant rainwater.

Luckily for her, it will be a few more years before her palette gets that discerning.

Objectively Losing It.

August 3, 2011October 1, 2011 Rachel Callahan A Day in the Life, Actually Possibly Informational, Anal Retentivity to a Fault, Lose It Diet

Chris and I started our weight loss initiative on April 6, aiming to meet our goals by October 1. My goal was to be 130 pounds. Which, after getting a new scale and coming to grips with the fact that I weighed more than I thought, meant that I needed to lose 26 pounds.

I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to meet my goal – weight has never come off easily for me. I’ve tried many different exercise routines and diets through the years and have rarely had any level of measurable success.

But I’d never tried counting calories before – all of my diet plans had been vague stabs in the dark, nothing objective and concrete. And since Chris had been successful with Lose It before, and it was FREE, I wanted to give it a try.

So…after entering everything I ate into Lose It religiously for 16 weeks, paired with a little (or a lot of) help from a nursing baby, I am already beyond my goal – at 128.6 pounds!

(I thought it would be a nice little reward to wear that poor shirt that I stretched within an inch of it’s life for all of my pregnancy shots. I can almost see it breathing a sigh of relief.)

Chris is also doing awesome – he has currently lost 31 pounds, and wants to lose 11 more by our deadline.

Doesn’t he look fabulous?!?

He’s turned it up since I reached my goal last week – I’ve been celebrating with French Fries and coke, and he’s put his nose to the ground, refusing even a bite of my delectable treats.

Competition is a healthy addition to any weight loss plan, after all.

So – what did we really have to change?

Basically, all that the Lose It App does is give you a calorie budget and provide a database of foods built in so that you can keep up with it. We still eat mostly the same things, but tracking it really makes us think about how much and how often we eat – I’m convinced that accountability alone solved over half of my problem.

When I cook, I calculate the calories of each recipe based on the ingredients. I’ve made small changes to help cut calories, like using 93/7 ground beef, no yolk egg noodles, and finding alternative sides to replace our usual buttery croissant rolls. But I still cooked all of our family favorite recipes with minimal tweaking.

Going out to eat hasn’t been as hard as I’d feared – by looking up and going nerdy analyzing our calories beforehand, we were able to make some easy changes to make our favorites fit into our calorie budget – here are some examples:

(Warning: Calorie spoiler alerts ahead.)

Eating locally, albeit always our favorite choice anyway, definitely proved to be much more calorie friendly. Zoes has gotten even more of our business than usual, as has Taziki’s, Outtakes, Silvertron, Nabeel’s, and The Fish Market. (Also notable: almost all of these are Greek-based. Greek is healthiest!)
We still ate at Firehouse Subs every Thursday night before small group, but we cut the mayonnaise off of our sandwiches, barely noticed a taste difference, and saved 200 calories each.
We actually tried the option of wrapping our burgers in lettuce (instead of buns) at Red Robin, really enjoyed them (except for the messy part), and saved several hundred calories.
Zaxby’s was a killer. I analyzed each individual item that came in the meal, figured out exactly how many chicken fingers, fries, and sauce I could have, then split my meal with Ali – as opposed to thoughtlessly eating it all like I would have previously done. I saved over 500 calories.

Things that we do eat less of than we used to: French Fries, coke, chicken fingers, potatoes of all kinds, ice cream, but NOT chocolate – as I said in our last update, chocolate is a dieting necessity.

Cheat Days: We have a cheat day about every three weeks (and even more often recently). I remember each one with a delightfully high level of fondness – we ate whatever we wanted and didn’t look at the calories, and it didn’t throw us off track at all.

Calorie Budget: I ate a little over 1,500 calories a day, lost about 1.75 pounds per week, and still made plenty of milk for Noah.

(He’s actually gotten rather chunky as proof, of which a lady at Target noticed yesterday and commented that I was FEEDING MY BABY TOO MUCH. I would have nominated her to be in the Awkwardly Intense Busybody Club except that her comment quite thrilled me, considering my former lactational issues.)

However, I will say that the lack of any exercise in my plan (Chris runs, but I’m not joining him due to two foot surgeries) does have the drawback of no belly toning. Smaller though it may be, my abs still sag, wrinkle, droop, and pillow with sadness at being stretched abusively for months on end, only to be rewarded with the intense pleasure of being hacked open, leaving muscles and epidermal layers permanently traumatized.

So. I’m going to utilize the rest of the time until our October 1 goal to work on my ab flab. I don’t know if it’s possible (especially since I have an aversion to exercise and I don’t remember a time when I had toned abs, even pre-hacking), so I am open to all of your ab-reclaiming recommendations.

Except for The Shred.

I don’t think I nor my hacked abs are brave enough to face that level of agony again quite yet.

Because Confession is Good for the Soul…

August 1, 2011August 1, 2011 Rachel Callahan Don't Listen to my Fashion Advice, I embarrass myself just for your amusement., It's Tough Being a Girl, Just My Luck, Smocktastic, Weird Strange and True

My Mother felt so cleansed of guilt and shame after my post on Friday that she brought me more evidence of my childhood mistreatments that very night.

(That and she’s been cleaning out her basement, but that’s beside the point.)

As it turns out, The Atrocity wasn’t a one-time offense, nor perhaps even as bad as it got. In fact, it is becoming quite apparent that I lived my entire childhood with no peripheral vision at all – like a horse with blinders, I was.

…or at least that’s what I’d title this if it were a piece of art (which it obviously is).

At any rate, at least JC was allowed his dignity.

Well, aside from that Winged Precious Moments Bunny he was so delicately holding.

My Blogging Tips From See Jane Write

July 31, 2011August 1, 2011 Rachel Callahan Actually Possibly Informational, I'm a Blog Geek, Writing WAY Out of my Comfort Zone

I usually don’t feel competent or comfortable giving blogging advice – my blog doesn’t hang out in the “how-to” category much (unless we’re talking about something insane like how to make a Breastmilk Smoothie or a Presidential Christmas Gift list). Out of my 1,200+ posts, only one (before this one) has ever been on the topic of blogging itself.

But last week, I really stepped out of my comfort zone and spoke on a blogging panel organized by See Jane Write. The organizer, Javacia, was kind enough to give us a list of possible topics beforehand. So to quell my nervousness, I made ridiculously geeky copious notes (of which I geekily shuffled through the entire presentation). Some of these topics we discussed and some we didn’t, but I wanted to go ahead and publish my notes in hopes that they may be useful to someone.

I really wish I had been taking notes on the stellar advice of my fellow panelists, Jen and Laura Kate and Trish from Birmingham Mommy – those girls are awesome!! But I wasn’t that coordinated. So since I don’t have theirs, mine will have to do. And go visit their blogs – you won’t regret it!

Choosing a Topic and Platform

Is a topic or niche for your blog necessary?

If you have a sustainable, passionate topic, go for it! (Ask yourself: can you write about this subject forever?) If not, there’s nothing wrong with a variety show. I love keeping it fresh and surprising my readers with varying topics – they never know what they’re going to find when they click on my site.

And sometimes, NOT having a niche helps have a wider reading audience.

Platform

Whatever you use, I recommend using Windows Live Writer to compose – it’s free and awesome (see this post for it’s benefits).

Three Main Choices: Blogger, WordPress.org, WordPress.com

Blogger:
- Pros: Easy to start, easy to understand, easy to customize, easy to code, free.
- Cons: VERY buggy (and they don’t care much to fix them), considered “immature” (who cares?), not dynamic.

WordPress.com: (only one I haven’t used – not an expert)
- Pros: secure, moderate to start & understand, free.
- Cons: not dynamic, not customizable, no widgets, cannot have any sidebar ads.

WordPress.org (this is what I use now):
- Pros: most dynamic, widgetable, customizable, professional platform.
- Cons: Expensive (you have to buy your own domain and hosting), you’re responsible for hosting & backups, hard to start & understand, and apparently easy to hack.

Net: If you’re planning on being a professional blogger, use WordPress.org. Otherwise, use Blogger. There doesn’t seem to be any value added in using WordPress.com over Blogger.

Also, if you use WordPress.org, invest in using Vaultpress for your backups – they do a stellar job and offer great service if you ever have a problem with your site.

How did you get into blogging? When did you start and what prompted you to do so? Even though it was my dream and plan from the time I was a little girl to become a stay at home Mom, it was a very difficult transition for me. Going from a very fast-paced career as a small business accounting department manager to “so my job is to sit on this couch and hold a screaming, non-responsive infant. All day long.” was bizarre. I was lonely, I didn’t know what I was doing, and I needed an outlet.

Blogging allowed me the social interaction I missed, the opportunity to document my child, and, therefore, appreciate the moments more, and gave me an objective goal – something to feel like I’d accomplished something by the end of the day.

When I first considered blogging, though, I thought no one would want to read about my life. But after realizing I enjoyed reading other Mommy Blogs, I decided to give it a try. I was immediately hooked. The name of my blog stated the purpose of it: Grasping for Objectivity in my Subjective Life.

Getting an Audience

Use your social network (Twitter, Facebook, etc), but don’t abuse your social network (Don’t let your only statuses be links to your blog). Invite your family and friends to read – there’s no easier, more loyal audience to place as your blog’s cornerstone.

Be reciprocal – if someone visits your blog and comments, go to their blog and get to know them! Respond to their comment by email if you can, but visit them as well. They want you to be as interested in them as they are in you. Readers will almost all eventually wander off if you ignore them. Plus, the main fun in blogging is the relationships.

Comment, Comment, Comment. But be relational – don’t comment just to get a comment back – comment to become friends. Many bloggers will abide by the be reciprocal rule and come visit your blog.

Find a like-minded blog community and get involved in it. I did this with 5 Minutes for Mom – I remember when I first started participating in their site – I felt like a tiny piece of sand on a huge beach – but now I’ve met them in person multiple times, have worked for them at BlogHer, and write for them from time to time. There are many of these types of networking sites available .. BlogHer, SITS, Alabama Bloggers, Birmingham Mommy … find one that fits your blog’s niche.

Talk and interact with other bloggers on Twitter.

Meet other local bloggers in person –here are some local options: See Jane Write, Alabama Bloggers, ALsocme.

I also have a secondary blog, B-Sides, which is where I put things that I want to document about my family but that would probably be boring for non-grandmothers. This keeps my main blog from becoming overcrowded.

Monetizing your Blog:

Set ethical guidelines for yourself and stick to them. Your integrity is much easier lost than gained.

Don’t compromise your writing for the dollar – i.e., don’t significantly change your writing style, topic, or ethics to make money – it will steal your joy of writing and you will find yourself wondering why you started writing in the first place. If making money requires you to lose the reason you started blogging, then it’s not worth it.

Focus on your writing and building relationships with your readers, not money. If you focus on the money and try to blog to make money, you you will never get there. If money is the reason you’re blogging, do something more profitable with your time – because you can make a lot more doing other things!

For every dollar you make, you are selling – and potentially cheapening – some part of your blog. Make sure what you are selling is worth the money that you’re making. Some ads cost you little (sidebar ads, footers on particular posts), but some ads cost you mightily (“tricky” links within posts, taking your readers to something that has nothing to do with the post. This will sour your readers toward you). Just because the money is good doesn’t mean it’s worth it for what you’re giving to the advertisers.

Don’t do ads that only pay you when your readers click on their ads (i.e. Google Ads) – you will never win. Accept ads that are commission based on the number of total hits your site receives or even better, pay an upfront, annual fee.

Have a media kit stating your site overview and stats, your policies and guidelines, and your advertising rates. Send this back to anyone inquiring about buying ad space on your site.

Ads paid upfront are almost always negotiable – if they offer you one price, you can counter-offer and will usually get it.

The Blogher Ad Network is a great place to start. It’s almost always listed as closed, but if you email them, they’re often open to taking new members.

Maintaining Momentum

Finding time to blog regularly: if you begin to make time for it, it will become a part of your schedule. Not very helpful, but true. My blogging time is during my kid’s naptimes and my husband’s running time.

Tips for generating ideas:

If a crazy idea pops into your head, nurse it, water it, fertilize it. If you find yourself overanalyzing something ridiculous, do the same. Some of my best posts were random observations that I found myself speaking out loud before I thought about them, then realized they’d be really fun blog posts. Examples: Carnivorous Creations, Mom Jeans, Mommy Scouts.

Let other people be a part of the creative process. Some of my best ideas came from my husband. He’d be an amazing blogger, but doesn’t have time, so he gladly drops his ideas off on my blog’s doorstep. Examples: TMI Greeting Cards, Baby Tips.

Let your photographs guide you. Look back through them and ask what story they’re telling. Examples: Hollywood, and almost all of the NoahBlogs posts.

Find interesting and unique ways to tell a story. Don’t just tell it, but craft it – weave it. Fit it into a creative framework. Examples: Kiosk Warfare, The Placenta Post.
Go on adventures. Do crazy things. It will give you plenty of blog content and a bit of fun. Examples: Uncles Joe’s Tot Locker, I Adore My Husband Even When He’s An…

Beyond the Blog – generating opportunities, particularly writing opportunities • Network, meet people in person, accept menial jobs at first – they will lead to bigger ones, get involved in networks. I’ve stayed fairly true to my blog, so I didn’t have much input on this.

30 Second Elevator Pitch – I stink at this. I’ve never had a good one. The best way I can think to describe my blog is a variety show of the minutia of my mind.

How long is too long for a blog post? I try to keep the majority of my posts under 700 words (unlike this one). I try never to go over 1,500 words. However, my most popular post ever was over 2,000 words, so if it’s good enough, break the rules.

How do you get ideas for posts and what do you do when you’re facing blogger’s block? I have spurts of ideas. I can go a week without a single creative idea, then get four in one day. I just try not to panic and wait for them to come to me.

As I mentioned, I also occasionally am given ideas from others – my husband and even my readers send me things they think I should blog about. I love this – it feels like receiving a bonus check in the mail!

I also don’t force writing – if I have nothing to blog about, I don’t blog.

How often do you blog? In general, how often do you think a blog should be updated? On average, 5 times a week. When I started, I blogged 2-3 times a day, then settled into once a day, then gave myself Saturdays off, then when I got pregnant and was horrifically sick, let myself off the hook for a daily schedule.

I like the freedom of knowing that if I don’t have anything to blog about today, I don’t have to blog and my readers won’t freak. I think a blog should be updated at least 3 times a week to maintain interest and a loyal readership.

Any tips on making time to blog on a regular basis? Let things stew in your mind all day long so that when you sit down at the computer, all you have to do is type.

Let me know if you have any questions or would like for me to expound on any of the above topics – I will answer any and all questions in the comments section.

The Atrocity – A True Story.

July 29, 2011April 22, 2014 Rachel Callahan Don't Listen to my Fashion Advice, I embarrass myself just for your amusement., It's Tough Being a Girl, Photographical Oddities, Smocktastic, This is TONGUE IN CHEEK People - Don't take me Seriously., Utter Silliness, Weird Strange and True

She was young when she committed the crime, a crime that would scar me deeply and shape who I am today.

She was so young that I’m sure she didn’t realize the full breadth and consequences of her actions – no one had taught her any better, after all.

Guilt subconsciously crept in and flooded her mind, making her repress the memory and stow away the evidence so as not to have to face the condemnation from her soul.

For twenty-eight years, the crime went unpunished and unacknowledged.

Until she accidentally came face to face with that well-hidden proof.

She did a double-take. She gasped in horror, as all of a sudden she remembered that she had indeed brought that travesty down upon my head.

So much made sense now – she finally understood why I would feel the way that I do – feelings that she had previously written off as overly dramatic and unfounded.

But she now knew that the burden of guilt lay solely on her shoulders. And, being the woman of integrity that she is, she knew that she must confess.

She waited until we were alone, so that I would have the freedom to process my emotions. She handed me the proof and looked into my eyes, imploring my forgiveness.

“I’m so sorry. I really didn’t realize that it ever got this bad.”

I looked.

I shook my head and deeply sighed.

It hurt – most certainly.

I looked again – it was just as shocking the second time.

I closed my eyes and searched for the inner strength to do what I knew needed to be done – and, though the words clung to the roof of my mouth like chewing gum on the bottom of a food court table, I did it. I granted her my forgiveness.

My brother, however, may not feel quite as merciful.

Sequel can be found here.

The Awkwardly Intense Busybody Club.

July 27, 2011September 19, 2011 Rachel Callahan A Day in the Life, Awkwardly Intense Busybody Club, Just My Luck, Storytime, Weird Strange and True

The Public and I have had a challenging time lately.

It all started with the Checkout Lady at Michael’s – remember her?

The only explanation that I can think of for what has happened since then is that she was so worried about my disdainful care of my infant that she called together an urgent meeting of all of her fellow members of the Awkwardly Intense Busybody Club and urged them to begin stalking me.

First, there was the AIBC Member at Chick-Fil-A.

The Kids and I were at the mall – the ultimate in crazy Chick-Fil-A experiences. The counter guy said, “Next in line, please”, and made eye contact with me, generally indicating that he somehow magically knew that I was next in line even though the “line” looked more like cattle being prodded into a pasture fifty times too small.

(I was going to use a Tinkerbell / Sprinting Thistles analogy there, but, just in time, considered the fact that maybe all of you don’t watch as much Tinkerbell as I do.)

So. Right as I was about to move forward, someone cut in front of me to get a drink refill.

I really didn’t mind – I’ve been there before, too, just desperately wanting a refill and not wanting to wait behind the herd of cattle / Sprinting Thistles to get it. So I waited patiently, knowing that her refill interruption would take approximately 5 seconds off of my day.

However, the lady behind me valued those 5 seconds much more than I. In a tone indicating a strong opinion about my inability to control my own destiny, she spoke into my ear, “She cut in front of you, huh?”

Without turning, I said, “Yup.”

Then, in the exact same ooey gooey syrupy sweet voice that Michael’s Lady used when she told Noah that he was going to choke and die because of my lack of care, Line Lady bent over in Noah’s general direction and cooed, “We just need to learn to be more assertive, don’t we?”

Obviously, somebody somewhere is teaching a class called “The Ultimate in Subtlety: Say It To Their Baby”.

Then there was the AIBC Member at Publix.

I don’t know where you stand on this issue, but there are two types of people in the world:

1. The type of person who wants someone to greet them, offer to help them, and be at their beck and call their entire shopping experience, and

2. The type of person who desires above all else to be left alone with their thoughts and their shopping, and abhors overly pushy or even just helpful clerks.

Okay, there are three types.

3. The type of person who wants the clerk to leave them alone until they absolutely need something, and then magically appear.

I’m a type two, at times pushing type three – but only if I’ve already searched thoroughly for what I need. I mean, I wish they knew the magical time to appear, but usually instead they appear right when Ali is asking an embarrassing question or I’m wiping leaking poo off of Noah and their merchandise.

So anyway, because of my typical type-twoness, I have an aversion to accepting help from the Publix bag-boys when they offer to take my groceries out to my car. It just seems too – luxurious, or something.

So last week, on a day when the heat index was well over 100 degrees, I headed to my car with both kids and a cart full of groceries.

As I was trying to wrangle Noah’s first Car-Buggy trip and get the groceries out without letting him roll down the hill or do this to the steering wheel,

the lady owning the minivan next to me arrived, no kids, with the bag-boy pushing her cart.

And apparently, despite her super-magic double-sided sliding doors and automatically opening rear gate, she wanted her groceries loaded in on the side I was using.

She impatiently waited for me to get my groceries and kids shoved into the car so that she could stand there and continue to tap her foot while the bag-boy loaded her van.

As I was putting the last of what felt like a dozen kids into the car, I said “Sorry”, quietly in her general direction.

At which she replied haughtily, “I NEVER bring my kids grocery shopping with me.”

Oh. Well there you have it. Obviously, I should have just left them at home.