Rachel Callahan

Guess where I am today!

Posted on Posted by Rachel Callahan Categories Newsflash, Shamelessly Plugging Away

I am over at 5 Minutes for Mom’s awesome sister site, 5 Minutes for Parenting!!

I will be hosting a weekly column there where I will be featuring different blogger’s most humorous posts about parenting and children.

I am so excited to join their amazing team, and am also really looking forward to reading all of the great blog submissions that I will be getting!

Be sure to head on over and check it out!

And, if you’re visiting my site from 5 Minutes For Parenting, WELCOME!

Please feel free to peruse the site, and especially check out my “most popular posts” I have listed at the left. They include stories about art made from my Uncle’s toenail clippings for my Aunt’s Christmas presents, a photographic rendering of everything I learned NOT to do with my baby during the first year of her life (or maybe everything that I learned wasn’t so dangerous after all – but I’m not admitting which it is!), my adventures of mixing with Pop Culture “enthusiasts” AND their response to my documentary on their convention, how I managed to brutally wound myself while sleepwalking, and various other adventures and stories.

I also have a giveaway going on right now for three sets of awesome books – just comment on the post to enter!

Thanks for stopping by, and I hope to see you often! AND don’t forget to follow the instructions at 5 Minutes for Parenting on how to submit your most humorous blog!

Football, Sticky Insides, and Bizarrity

Posted on Posted by Rachel Callahan Categories A Day in the Life, Football and I have a Complicated Relationship, Weird Strange and True

Today was the Alabama/Kentucky game. I had major trouble focusing because
a) I really think it was a boring game (or at least for a non-die-hard-fan), and
b) I was soooooooo sleepy.

I am pretty positive that the reason for my sleepiness was this:
Yes, last night, Chris and I had a FABULOUS meal at The Melting Pot for my birthday (6 days early – opening the start of “The Birthday Season”). It was delectable, of course. But I seriously think that Nebuchadnezzar (or Mr. Nezzar, as he’s known in Veggie Tales) was making Daniel and the guys eat at The Melting Pot, which is why they were so much less energetic pre-their-new-diet.

Last night when we got home, I felt like the cheese and chocolate fondues were like glue in my insides, and everything felt sticky and stuffed – more like my whole body cavern was filled with molasses. And today, I have been so sleepy all day.

I think I’m going to not eat for a month.

But it was worth it. Getting to dip strawberries, bananas, cheesecake, brownies, pound cake, rice krispy treats, and white and chocolate marshmallows into white and dark chocolate is worth it alone, besides the fact the cheese fondue and the amazing array of 6 meats that we cooked at our table. Oh and the salad. OOOH I’m feeling sticky all over again.

So anyway, back to the game. I was so sleepy that I didn’t even take funky pictures like last time – this was the only picture that was taken, and it was taken by Chris:
So here’s the bizarrity.

This is Chris’ 20th year to sit in our seats at the game (and my 10th year), and for all 20 years, the same two people – Linda and Wayne – have sat in the seats directly in front of him (us). So of course, we know them pretty well, as we look at the backs of their heads for three hours at a time at least 8 times a year. That’s what – like 480 hours of back-of-head-looking? Anyway, Linda mentioned today that her husband thought he saw Chris the other day, but she knew that was highly unlikely. Chris asked where, and he said on (a road near our house). Chris said, “Yup, that was me. We live one road over from there.” Then Linda said “You live in (insert our neighborhood name here)?!?!?! So do we!!” – – they live two streets up from us!!

So they are our neighbors at Bryant-Denny and our neighbors for real! Out of 90,000+ people in the stadium. . .in a city an hour away from mine. . .and our neighborhood is a tiny, obscure little neighborhood with all of 6 streets. Isn’t that bizarre?

If she wakes up screaming, at least I’ll know why. . .

Posted on Posted by Rachel Callahan Categories Parent of the Year, Toddlers: The Experience, Utter Silliness

Ali’s bedtime routine includes a bible story and prayers. She loves both, which is so wonderful. I love that she begs to read the bible and to pray!

Ali has her own bible, a children’s bible, of course. She calls it “Ali Bible” (which sounds a just a little bit like “Ali Baba”). Being a children’s bible, they usually “softball” the stories a bit, and write them in a way that children can comprehend. However, sometimes they are comically blunt. Here are the stories from the last two nights:

God is Angry

God told his people to listen to Moses, but some of them said they wouldn’t obey Moses any more. God is very angry with these men. God tells everyone to get away from them, because He is going to hurt them. Then all of a sudden the ground opens up and there is a big hole. They fall down into the ground, along with their houses and their friends, and everything they own. Then the earth closes up again and they are all killed.
Numbers 16:23-35

The Snake of Brass

Can you see all the snakes in this picture? Do you know why they are biting the people? It is because the people have been bad again. So God has sent these poisonous snakes to come bite the people, and many of the people are dying. They have come to Moses. They say, “We have been bad. Please ask God to take away the snakes.” So Moses prayed for the people and the Lord told him to make a brass snake and put it on a pole. Moses took a hammer and some brass and made a snake. It isn’t a real snake; it isn’t alive. God told Moses that anyone who looked at the snake on the pole would get well again. The people in the picture are looking at the brass snake on the pole. Now they will be all right. But anyone who won’t look will die.
Numbers 21:5-9

Sweet Dreams, Ali!!

she was a very useful engine. . .

Posted on Posted by Rachel Callahan Categories On a more serious note. . ., Toddlers: The Experience

It’s bad when my blog titles are quotes from “Thomas the Train”.

Today was our first day to go to work since Gina started her new job. Despite the fact that Gina spent the better part of her last week’s workdays in tears (and I mean bawling her eyes out, not just a smidge of wetness on the face. I think the guys were starting to get a BIT uncomfortable), I told her quite plainly that Ali and I wouldn’t miss her, because we would still be seeing her at least once a week by going to lunch.

However, I had not given Gina the credit she deserved for entertaining Ali at the office!

I guess I didn’t completely realize how helpful Gina was in that area. If I needed to have a meeting with someone, I didn’t have to worry about where Ali was headed, because I knew that Gina was watching her.

Today, Mark needed to talk to me, but I kept having to get up and look down the hallway because I would hear the pitter-pattering of little feet take off, and I didn’t know if she had a guardian with her or not. And forget sitting still in Mark’s cubicle – she’s used to going wherever she wants, with Gina close behind!

However, Ali seemed to handle the transition fairly well. She still started talking about Gina as soon as we turned onto the road about a mile from work (for whatever reason, that is the point that she realizes where we’re going), but I explained that Gina now worked somewhere else, and so Gina wouldn’t be there. Ali thought for a minute, then said “OK”, while nodding her head vigorously. However, when we walked in the office, she started her usual scream of “GINA!!” and running down the hallway. I reminded her that Gina was bye-bye, and she quickly changed her focus and started yelling “TIM!! Stickers!!”

Tim moved into Gina’s cubicle (already!!! Who knew that was such prime real estate!?!), but Ali didn’t seem too confused. I think it helped that Tim hasn’t yet changed out all of the stuff in the drawers, so Ali was still able to open the top drawer and get all of her “play purties” out. Hopefully, Tim will leave them for a while.

And, although Ali hung around Tim more than usual since he seemed to take on Gina’s role by being in her cubicle and being the keeper of her toys, he wasn’t nearly the stellar entertainer and babysitter that Gina was. No one could be.

And not that I expect him to be. It’s just that. . .

I need a new work babysitter.

And, if I know Gina, this post will make her start bawling all over again. At least the guys won’t have to deal with it this time. Sorry, Gina’s new co-workers.

Thankful Thursday

Posted on Posted by Rachel Callahan Categories Thankful Thursday

I have had a wonderful week (especially compared to last week), and I am thankful for much!

I am especially thankful today for our many rich friendships and wonderful family.

What got me started thinking about this was Ali’s bedtime prayers last night. Every night, we ask her who she wants to pray for. Sometimes she’ll say someone, and sometimes she won’t. It is usually Mommy, Daddy, Eli, or AJ. But last night, she went through the list!! She asked to pray for Radford, Evie, Lydia, AJ, Eli, Lindsay, Ashley, Mommy, Daddy, Gramamma, Pop, and probably a few others I’m forgetting about! It was so precious to see how excited she was about praying for so many people!

Ali and I are BOTH thankful for ALL of our wonderful family and friends – – – that’s you!!!

OK – your turn!! What are you thankful for today? Leave it in a comment, or if you have a blog, write a post and link it in with Mr. Linky, and you can have the pleasure of welcoming my wonderful readers to your site!

To use Mr. Linky to link to your blog, just type in your name in the first slot, then copy and paste the URL of your blog post in the second one and click “Enter” – then there will be a link to your post from my blog!

Caught

Posted on Posted by Rachel Callahan Categories Toddlers: The Experience, Utter Silliness

Late yesterday afternoon, Ali asked for some M&M’s. I knew that Daddy would be home soon, so I wanted to wait and let Daddy give them to her, so I told her that Daddy would give her some when he got home.

However, the idea sounded appealing, so while she headed off to watch for Daddy in the window, I grabbed a few M&M’s and ate them quickly before I went to join her.

She didn’t see me get them, but as soon as I got to her, she either smelled it or heard me chewing the last bite.

As soon as I sat down, she was prying my mouth open and examining every inch of the inside of it, saying in a half accusatory, half excited-because-there-might-be-some-left voice, “Mommy candy!!!! Mommy M&M’s!!!!”

Oops. I’m going to have to get sneakier.

Slightly Less Wordy Wednesday

Posted on Posted by Rachel Callahan Categories Wordless Wednesday - as IF I could be wordless.

Ali checking out her new fall clothes this morning. . .
All of the little girls lined up and watching Veggie Tales at our Sunday School party on Saturday. Of course, my child is the only one checking out everyone else and not watching.Saturday night, Pop and Gramamma came over to watch the game. I ended up letting Ali stay up late to get to visit with them. She wanted Pop to have pretty hair. Only for Ali would he do this:
Then of course, Ali had to play hairdresser on Gramamma:
Naturally, however, Ali did not want pretty hair.

Electricity (and Gramamma) Saves the Day!!

Posted on Posted by Rachel Callahan Categories A Day in the Life, Just My Luck

I am exhausted.

I don’t really have an excuse, except for a just plain busy morning.

Oh yeah, and I got up earlier than usual. Maybe that’s it.

I had my post-surgical doctor’s appointment at 8am this morning, so I dutifully set my alarm clock back to 6:30 instead of it’s usual 7. Life is tough, I know. So I got up, got ready, and then did that thing that every mother hates doing:

I woke Ali up.

I know. It’s painful.

Not that she minded – she was a good sport – it’s just that every mother relishes that time in the morning to get things done pre-baby-wakeup (some mothers don’t even get any, so I really appreciate mine) and so it just hurts to wake them.

So I had decided the night before that to save time and not have to wake Ali up quite as early, I would just give her some milk, pop her in the car, and then she and I would go get Chick-fil-a or something for breakfast between my doctor’s appointment and bible study.

So we get in the car just in time to get to the doctor on time and I turn the key, and . . . nothing.

Nothing at all.

Not even that clicking noise that it makes when a battery usually goes dead.

And of course I’m in the garage, so the thought of how to get my big ole’ SUV out of the ONE CAR garage so that it could be jumped off was daunting. But I remembered that my parents had some sort of nifty device that would jump a battery without another car, so I called Dad (who was out of town) who told me that yes, they did have one of those. So I called Mom, and she headed over, still in her jammies and without contacts in yet (thankfully for the other drivers out this morning, she DID have on her glasses) to save me.

She brought over her nifty little device, hooked it up, and after a few minutes, I had a fully charged battery!! Yup, my mom is even more automotivally self-sufficient than I am!!!

Let me tell you, this thing is wonderful. Now, you do have to plug it into an electrical outlet, but if you’re in a one car garage, that’s much easier to do than to hook up to another car. AND it’s only $49.99!!

I will be buying one of these very soon. This week, probably.

Actually, AutoZone SHOULD give me one for this free advertising, but oh well.

It turned out that the problem was that there was a light on in the backseat. There is a light on the hand grip in the doorway in which I put Ali in and take her out of the car, and I have bumped it a couple of times, either with her head or mine.

Dad called later to check on me and quoted scripture on how to fix this problem: If my eye offends me, pluck it out. Good idea. I will be removing that light bulb as well.

But Dad, if you remove the bulb like you suggested, then if you hit the light, is it smart enough to not divert power to that empty socket, and therefore not run down my battery and not even have a light on to alert me?

I know that may be a stupid question, but better to ask than not and find out it wasn’t a stupid question. . .

Anyway, back to why I am exhausted. There was that, then my doctor’s appointment an hour late (I called in and they said I could come in late) at which we waited for quite a while to see the doctor for all of 30 seconds and for him to say I was fine, then a rush to bible study, then a rush to the grocery store and then lunch at the park with the rest of the fam, and then a rush to get home as we were headed for a late naptime.

So I put an exhausted Ali in bet, and then I get in my office, and I am just dead. I try to work, but with very little progress. So I took a break. I read blogs. I wrote blogs. I found pictures. And I’m still exhausted, and I really need to get some work done. So I’m going to try again now.

See you soon!

Power Nap

Posted on Posted by Rachel Callahan Categories I would NEVER take too many pictures. . .

One of my favorite sites, 5 Minutes for Mom, is having another photo contest!!! And, I usually get a bit coo coo when they have one of these. Just check out my SEVEN painfully planned and put together posts at the end of July – before I realized that I could only post one. Also, I got in the finals in April with this entry, so ever since then, the 5MFM Photo bug has bit me!!

This contest is for pictures of sleeping angels, and the prize is an entire kid’s bedroom suite!! (Of course, I would pick the beautiful Lily Rose set)

Here is my entry: Ali at Aunt Kitty and Uncle Leo’s beach house taking a super quick power nap (with milk still in-hand-and-on-chin)- all snuggly and cuddly, on the floor. That’s when you know she’s comfortable at your house!!!
p.s. – shameless plug for 5 Minutes for Mom – check out this site run by one of the twins that runs 5MFM – these retro toys and pedal cars look so much fun – and totally something my Dad would have bought us as kids!