In our pre-kid days, Chris and I had the peculiar hobby of reading Screen It reviews before, during, or even instead of watching movies. Geared toward parents, the site gives an intensely detailed yet discreet laundry list of every profanity or slightly negative word in the movie, detailed descriptions of all violence, drug use, or […]
On Declaring Independence.
I know that you’ve all been waiting with intense anticipation for an update on the fallout of Noah’s stomach virus. I am here for you. I am gleeful to report that, although it did last through the night and he woke up Thursday morning with his bed in such an abominable state that if I […]
When Children Are Like Salt in a Wound.
Ali lost her fourth tooth in a month on Thursday night. Okay, “lost” doesn’t accurately portray the traitorous and forceful separation of tooth and child that had to take place. Unlike the three previous teeth, this one wasn’t eager to turn loose, and I didn’t exactly achieve stellar parental ranking by a) insisting on removing […]
“Life is Hard,” Say Kids Everywhere
Tuesday’s plans included the grocery store and the pool. When I told the kids this news, Ali said with a sigh, “Let’s go to the grocery store first. I like to get the hard things over with first.” “Oh really, honey, is going to the grocery store so hard for you?” “Yes, it’s just not […]
Parenting By Manipulation.
For those of you who were around last year, you will remember that Ali got fired from Private Swim Lessons. And rightfully so – she doggedly persevered in her 6.5 year rebellion against allowing water to come into contact with her face. The child doesn’t have a strong-willed cell in her brain – except when […]
Three Teeth and a Babysitter.
Upon the loss of one’s eldest child’s first tooth, parental discussion has to take place. Are we going to do the Tooth Fairy thing? How far does our willingness to “Fairy It Up” go? How much does the Tooth Fairy pay for teeth these days? We agreed that yes, we would do the Tooth Fairy, […]
Seven Years Comin’
From our honeymoon onward, Chris and have I adored the beach. We would spend entire days laying on the sandy shores of Alabama, reading, napping, swimming, and living as if we had no responsibilities. NONE. It was our most freeing happy place in the world. And then, six years into marriage, we had a baby. […]
If Only God Had Expounded.
I think we can all agree that God could have been more detailed. I mean sure, He wrote the #1 bestseller of all time and it is QUITE voluminous. But there were some items that He could have really made our lives smoother if He’d fleshed out a bit more. Sprinkle or dunk? Wafers or […]
Mother’s Day Wishes and Dreams.
I do hope you all had a fantastic Mother’s Day and were overwhelmed [like physically overwhelmed – literally covered up with cards and stickers] with your children’s unconditional love and kindness [bursting through your door and waking you up first thing in the morning] – just like I was. I’m not exactly sure what she’s […]
Things that Blow My Toddler’s Mind.
Every time we bathe, dear child, I will wash and rinse your hair. This is not some sort of water torture I have forged break your will and make you scream. There is no reason to fight me on leaning your head back – I am trying to save your sensitive little eyes from soap. […]