If I Were The President of Graco, all infant car seats would come with attaching PopeMobile-style glass cubes –
If I Were The President of Pampers, I would not be so ashamed at my product’s ability to contain poo that I wouldn’t even show the product on the packaging:
Not only does it keep the product in place, but it adds a stylish touch that helps boost any (tiny) man’s confidence.
…until a Wardrobe Malfunction occurs, anyway.
If I were the president of Car-Freshner, I’d do away with those awful smelling Pine-Sol Scented Air Fresheners…
And I’d invent a Car-Freshner scented with the only thing that smells better than New Car Smell – that’s right, New Baby Smell:
…and I bet you thought this post had something to do with politics.