I did WAY TOO MUCH talking here last week.  Those answer posts all went ridiculously over my self-inflicted-words-per-post-quota.  And now, thanks to those posts (and probably much more thanks to a tiny creature who likes to keep me awake at night), I’m left exhausted.


Anyone want to take over blogging for me?

Raise your hand if you do…

Going once…

Going Twice…


Perfect! A Volunteer!  What would you like to write about?

Your entire life???  That seems rather comprehensive, but okay…

What? You insist on typing in COMIC SANS?? Don’t you know that the world greatly frowns upon the usage of Comic Sans?!

Okay…if you think you’re cute enough to make up for it, be my guest and give it a try.

Week Zero: I wasn’t quite sure where I was or how I got here, and certainly hadn’t decided if it was better than the murky world from whence I came.  So I just zoned out or slept, hoping that when I woke up, things would make more sense.


0 Weeks

Week One: This new world ROCKS!  It’s like I’m royalty here! I have TWO personal servants that wait on me hand and foot…they even wipe my butt for me!!

1 Week

Week Two: Yeah…I’m the bomb.  They’re taking my picture all the time, holding me at all hours of the night…sometimes I wake up and cry just to count how long it takes for them to come running. I pretty much run this joint.

2 Week

Week Three: I’m starting to hit an awkward phase.  My face looks like Pizza and my head like an 80 year old man.  Funny…my personal Paparazzi isn’t taking as many pictures anymore.

3 Weeks

Week Four: The awkwardity worsens.  I’m starting to get worried that this may hurt my popularity.  I keep trying to catch the phone number on the Proactiv commercial, but I don’t know my numbers yet.  And my big sister refuses to help – I think she’s hoping my popularity will wane.  I wonder if she put Nair in my shampoo…

4 Weeks

Week Five: Well, acne or no acne, I made the servant that calls himself “Daddy” happy  by fulfilling his wishes to have a son in overalls.  Maybe he’ll protect me from the one that calls herself “Mommy”.  I suspect she’s been blogging about my awkwardness.

5 Weeks

Week Six:

The acne went away!!!!

My hair started to regrow!!!!!

It’s a miracle!!

This occasion calls for my first smile.

6 Week Smile

Week Seven:
I’ve found that the servants are quite attentive when I use my skill of charm.  I think I’ll use it more often…except in the middle of the night.  No matter how big I smile, they don’t come running!  So I’ll still keep the screaming strategy for times like that.

7 Week Smile

Week Eight: Funny, I’ve found that putting on the charm is really more fun than being fussy, too.  No wonder the servants like it so much.  In fact, I’m becoming such a little politician that I think I could run for office.  Now if I could just find some babies to kiss…

8 Week Smile

Well, that’s my memoirs.  And I totally plan for it to be the first New York Times Bestseller written in Comic Sans, even if I have to scream at my publisher all night long to get it done.

26 thoughts on “In Which His Life Flashes Before His Eyes.

  1. Sometimes, when I just need to smile, I read your blog.
    Noah, you are quite the writer. Perhaps you will guest blog more often. I hope so. :)

  2. The week seven picture is killing me! I would never get anything done! Between him and Ali, I would just sit around looking at them and thinking how cute they are!!!

  3. Hilarious…I agree with some of the other people. I would like Noah to post again and would love to see Ali post too–just maybe not on her whole life. ;)

  4. Aww, too cute! I can’t believe how much he has changed in just 8 weeks! I see a lot of Ali in that last picture. You guys make pretty cute kids! :)

  5. His smile is just like Ali’s. And that fuzzy blond hair. I think he’s got everything under control over there. Sounds like he has you just where he wants you.

  6. Through lurking! This is the cutest blog yet! Noah is precious (as is his big sister). It’s so much fun to follow your blog. Thank you for brightening my days!

  7. I remember when Fletch got infant acne. My heart hurt for him (so odd), and all I could think was that his teenage years are going to be hell for me!

  8. He’s REALLY looking alot like Ali! Especially in the next-to-last photo. His dimpled grins are adorable (as are hers!) – Landon is smiling some, but not this much yet. I really look forward to more, and especially laughs!

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