Marketing is supposedly essential for almost any business. Good marketing doesn’t just inform people about your stuff, or invite people to use your stuff, but it awakens the desires inside people for your stuff. M&Ms melt in your mouth, not in your hands. Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. You’re not yourself when you’re […]
The FaceTune Challenge.
So. Remember my post about using Facetune, and then feeling guilty for making my skin so smooth? I eventually did feel guilty enough to replace all of my profile pictures with the unedited images – they looked more like me, anyway. And the skin-so-smooth-I-haven’t-actually-had-that-since-I-was-seven was starting to annoy me. But one night as I was […]
It’s Time for Some Resolve.
– I resolve to run into less objects, which leave mysterious bruises on my upper thighs that I then spend days trying to remember what exactly I ran into. – If that resolution doesn’t stick, I resolve to keep a bruise diary. – I resolve to invent a car floorboard that eats Chick-Fil-A crumbs and […]
Don’t Text and Drive, But Feel Free to Garden.
My poor Flexi the Space Toaster is in the shop this week thanks to a busted water pump, which is entirely not at all cheap to fix. While I wait for her luxury stay at the spa to pass, Chris got me a rental car. It’s a Ford C-Max, which I had never heard of. […]
Smells Like Tween Spirit.
My daughter is tall – like 90th percentile tall. She’s always been tall. And we’re not quite sure why. Lately her tallness has been catching us off guard – if Chris takes a picture of her, I flip out a little on the inside at how old she looks. http://instagram.com/p/vtpUMIsb8i If I take a picture […]
Isn’t it Time to Talk to Your Doctor?
Have you found yourself weepy during this deplorable deletion of Daylight Savings Time and simultaneous bout of horrific weather? Have you looked out the window to the darkness, cursing its existence? Do you feel hopeless, as if warmth will never return to your life? Then you may be suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD, […]
Burning Questions of the Public Restroom.
I visit public restrooms more often than I’d prefer. My preference would be zero times per lifetime, of course, but as I drink 100+ ounces of water a day, that’s just not going to happen, unless I go all Boo Radley on you and never leave the house. And if I did that my blog […]
The Dilemna Dilemma.
I hated English in school, and I don’t expect that my blog follows the rules of the AP Stylebook – like, ever. I have endless grammar quirks that I am positive make my journalist friends secretly despise me. However, I have always been a fantastic speller. I’m convinced that spelling is something you’re born with […]
How to Use Essential Oils: A Step-By-Step Guide.
1. You will receive your first (and second, third, and four hundredth) introduction to Essential Oils via your favorite social network – most likely Facebook. This glorious day in your life will occur when you happen to mention any form of personal discomfort. A headache, scabies, a sword wound, or split ends. If the stars […]
Cherries Need New PR.
I spent 31 years of my life automatically assuming that I despised cherries. There was the cherry cough syrup I was given against my will as a young child, shaping my first impressions of cherries as The Fruit That Tastes Like Gastric Acid. Then there was cherry-flavored candy – it didn’t matter whether it was […]