It’s one of the things that comes with parenthood…there’s just no avoiding it. If you’re lucky, you get a few years off in between the Screaming of babyhood and the Screaming of teenagehood, but rest assured, you will endure many moments of Offspring Screaming. But luckily, Newborn Screaming is like pain: you can remember that […]
On Having a Social Media Baby: A Review.
As I’m sure you noticed, I made a conscious effort to share my entire pregnancy and birthing experience on social media via blogging, Facebook, and Twitter – at times possibly sharing more than some people wanted to know. I know that some of you thought I was crazy to give social media any attention while […]
GestationLand!!!
Welcome to the final stretch of your stay in GestationLand!!! Requiring a nine-month stay, GestationLand is a theme park that may get you treated like a Princess, but guarantees that you won’t feel like one!! By this time, you’ve already ridden on many of the thrill rides that the park has to offer, including: The […]
C (hristmas) before E (aster) but NEVER before T (hanksgiving).
There are two types of people in the world: Holiday Liberalists and The Holiday Police. The Liberalest of the Holiday Liberalists consist of the people who choose to start playing Christmas music in stores, put the decorations out in malls, and start selling Christmas Candy, all on the day after Halloween. (Oh, and of course […]
Social Media Policy for Labor and Birth
When Ali was born nearly four years ago, I felt like a Social Media Pioneer (even though it would be a couple more years before the term “Social Media” was coined), because I was the first person I knew to nearly-real-time publish birthing information and baby photos on Facebook. And, really, it wasn’t a big […]
Now Hiring: Mom Caddie.
Men play golf. (Some men, anyway – not my husband. And some women, I know. Forgive the generalization for a moment.) And, men get caddies. (Some men, anyway – surely not every man that plays golf can afford to have another man follow him around all day while he leisurely plays a game.) But at […]
Curses.
So I’ve been thinking a lot about Eve lately. No, not because of that disturbingly bizarre Pomegranate juice commercial where naked-but-tattooed-with-fig-leaves Eve is laying on the ground with a huge snake coiled around her… (washing the mental image from my brain) But because of The Curse. It’s becoming more and more apparent to me that […]
Kiosk Warfare: A Guide for Survival.
The mall is a glorious place for Moms of young children. Akin to an indoor playground for both Mother AND Child, it is full of glee-filled places such as Toy Stores, hot dog trucks, carousels, and, of course, shopping. But it doesn’t come without it’s risks – without the dangers of attack. The Kiosk Predators. […]
Modern Day Vocabularic Brainwashing.
For those of you who do not currently have a small child, you may be completely and blissfully unaware of what I’m about to tell you. But you deserve to know. A disturbing replacement has happened in vocabulary as we know it. A brainwashing, actually, has taken place. The term “Indian-Style”, in regards to the […]
An Ode to Waistbands.
Dear Regular, Wonderful, Adored-With-All-My-Being Jeans, You have served me well – much longer than I thought you would possibly be able to. Somehow, with your certainly-miraculous stretchiness and the help of many tortured waistline-expanding rubber bands (most who lost their lives in the line of duty), I have been able to enjoy your comfort up […]