For the first time in my life, it has recently been pointed out to me that Alabama is an unsafe place to live. And also for the second time in my life, less than a month later. I really had no idea. I was in denial. It’s so beautiful…It has to be perfect! All places […]
How Mommy Nobel Peace Prizes are Won.
“I’m having a bad day.” “I’m having a bad day too.” “Wanna join forces and do something really difficult together?” “Sure! Let’s be sure to take on something so challenging that it will surely be physically impossible for us to accomplish it with the quantity and ages of children that will be accompanying us.” “Perfect! I’ll pick […]
Marketing 101: A Crucial Skill For Parents.
Last Wednesday night, Ali had her Awanas awards ceremony. Noah had his Cubbies banquet the week before, and I remembered the agony of trying to get him to sit still through Ali’s ceremony last year. It negated any ability I had to celebrate my oldest child, and I had no desire for a repeat. So […]
For my Wistful Future Self.
A few weeks ago, I shared this video on Instagram. This is Noah’s current favorite phrase to me, thanks much to Farkle from “Girl Meets World.” When your five year old watches every episode of Girl Meets World 20 times with his nine year old sister…and he picks Farkle as his role model. It works […]
The Road to Purple Hair.
Since I’m having a rare introspective + selfie posting week….. So I finally got the purple highlights that I always wanted. Okay maybe not always because there was that one time I attempted to get pink hair but that was just a misguided desire for purple I’M SURE OF IT. But OF COURSE, Prince had to die […]
Minecraft, Soap Opera Mod.
“You know, I bet you and the kids would really love Minecraft, as much as y’all are into Lego.” This sentence, spoken by a very naïve version of myself sometime last year, solely goes to prove that “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” is a LIE. Since that […]
The Grand Bug Hunt.
“Do you need me to babysit this week? I need your kid’s help catching insects.” “Ummm, no…but you’re welcome to come over and we’ll help you catch bugs.” This conversation took place with my least in-tune-with-nature babysitter, Giann. Her idea of “outdoors” is going to an outlet mall, or perhaps eating outside – if the […]
The Fight Against Clutter.
Editor’s Note: I acknowledge that this post is way too long. I apologize profusely for my inability to break it into smaller posts. However, as a token of my sorrow, I offer you loads of pictures of the mess that my life was/is. May you take comfort in that. I could never put “Homemaker” on […]
You Can’t Go Back.
Chris and I started dating in 1999. It was a previous century – quite literally. I was 17 and he was 23 and neither of us had much money or culture. As such, our most elaborate dates happened at The Olive Garden. There was only one Garden Of Olives in town at the time, and […]
On Visiting The Knife-Happy.
I’ve noticed that there are two types of 30-somethings. Those that have a regular visit to the Dermatologist to get every millimeter of their skin scanned for abnormalities and are constantly mentioning what they’ve recently had removed, And those that have never visited a Dermatologist. I’ve always been in the second group. Not because I […]