UPDATED: A Plus Sized Sequel was published on October 12, 2012. Click here to read that post.
Three years ago, I wrote a blog post that inadvertently defined my identity as a blogger. It was about Mom Jeans. I didn’t really write it to be a how-to post – I wrote it as a humor post. Which is a fact that I am constantly explaining to people as they back up against walls for fear of my judging their butts.
However, I do feel that I have learned a thing or two about jeans, and also that comparison photography is a really great way to illustrate how to find a flattering fit. So I set off to write a true how-to post, in my own anal-retentive fashion.
I had 12 volunteers, ranging in age from 27 to 60, in size from 2 to 10, and accompanied by 22 children.
(I apologize for those who have requested plus-sized tips, but I had no plus-sized models volunteer. However, many of the tips contained herein apply across the board. Also, a plus-sized sequel is available here.)
First, a few important points of note:
- I have tried to match camera angles and lighting to the best of my ability in the comparison photos, and no photos have been doctored to look more or less flattering.
- Just because a pair of jeans doesn’t look right on one person doesn’t mean it won’t be the perfect fit on another – it’s all about fitting your particular body.
- High Quality (“designer”) jeans really make a difference. They fit better, look better, and last longer. However, the specific brand does not matter quite as much. I highly recommend being willing to try on jeans until you find the pair that looks perfect on you. Also, you never have to pay full-price for designer jeans – for instance, I get all of mine through HauteLook, and they’re usually over half off.
And the absolute most important point that I hope this post proves is this: If something doesn’t look attractive on you, don’t blame your body. Blame the clothes. The way your jeans fit can significantly swing your perceived weight by ten to twenty pounds. Hopefully you will be delightfully shocked at how drastically the fit of jeans can change the way a body looks.
So. Let’s get started.
1. Pockets.
I spent over 2,000 words talking about pocket placement on my Mom Jeans post, so I’m not going to reiterate all of that. However, there are some important notes worth illustrating.
A. The amount of space between your back pockets can greatly change your butt’s perceived size.
Meet Subject B, a 29 year old size five (who incidentally can be found blogging here).
Is that difference not stunning?
Subject G, a 36 year old size 9:
Subject J, a 31 year old size four, is another good example. Although the actual space between the pockets on these two pairs isn’t significantly different, the stitching down the middle drastically changes the perceived width:
Please note that this is a very tricky tip, because you can’t completely see your butt when you look in the mirror. You can twist and rubberneck all you want, but the width of the middle section of your backside will be hard to judge. This is why it’s important to never go jeans shopping alone.
B. The height placement and size of your pockets changes the shape of your butt.
Meet Subject D. She is a 30 year old size six who says that she struggles to find jeans due to her hips to waist ratio.
The pocket rule doesn’t change between bootcut and skinny jeans. Here is Subject E in skinny jeans – She is a 27 year old size 8.
If you are older and are worried about looking too young, have your pockets only slightly higher to give a modern look without looking Cougaresque. Subject F is a 60 year old size 10:
2. Tightness.
I personally like to wear my jeans snug. Not skin tight, but I do prefer the feeling that my jeans are somehow holding in some of my flab.
However, some people do not. And since tighter jeans are very much in style right now, many people are afraid that they can’t be in style if they aren’t willing to wear their jeans snug.
However, you can still achieve stylish curves without snugness.
Subject C is a 57 year old size 8 who did not want tight jeans. By combining proper pocket placement with a more modern color and leg flair, the following can be done:
Notice that her jeans aren’t at all tight, but they still look like they fit her body appropriately.
Subject F (60 year old / size 10) – notice how the right pair of jeans doesn’t just offer a more of a modern look, but a significant perceived weight reduction:
Age is not the only reason one might not want tight jeans. Subject A, a 32 year old size 4, has circulation issues. She can’t have her jeans binding on her legs without experiencing tingling and numbness.
To help her issues, we tried on extremely soft, high in spandex jeans. She achieved the modern look without the personal discomfort.
3. Flare
Jean flare is a highly controversial subject these days: to skinny jean or not to skinny jean? So I will preface this section with saying that this is simply my observation on what looks best, regardless of the current fads.
Your jean’s flare should be in direct proportion with your thigh size to be most flattering. Which means that if you have small thighs, wear skinny jeans. If you have normal to larger thighs, wear bootcut.
(Which also means that since we’re women, and therefore God blessed most of us with thighs, bootcut typically looks more flattering.)
There is one exception to this rule: if you have medium to large thighs and want to wear skinny jeans, you can offset this disproportion by wearing boots.
Examples:
Subject D (30 year old size 6) has normal sized thighs. As such, a bootcut looks most flattering.
(Out of 22 kids running around, you knew one of them would manage to make it into a photo – right??)
The difference in perceived thigh size can also be seen from the front:
Subject E (27 year old size 8 ) has small thighs. As such, skinny jeans are actually more flattering on her legs than bootcut.
Don’t let your thighs get lost in the flare, though. Subject H (32 year old size 8 ) shows how a cut in at the knees, then back out, produces the most flattering effect:
With regards to this rule, age does not necessarily matter. Subject C (57 year old size 8 ) was, I believe, surprised, at how flattering skinny jeans were on her body:
Although she wasn’t quite comfortable with the fit, the flattering look is quite undeniable.
The exception to the rule: Boots add width without taking away from the slimming effect, thereby offsetting thighs and actually making them look thinner:
4. Color / Feathering / Stitching
In general, just like all other clothing, the darker the color, the skinnier you will look. Subject A (32 year old size 4):
Also, feathering (lighter lines designed to imitate wrinkle marks) and fading toward the middle of the jeans can help minimize the thigh area and add attractive shapeliness. Subject D:
Subject G (36 year old size 9):
By going a shade darker and having lighter feathering, you lose about one perceived size. Subject E (27 year old size 8 ):
However, not all feathering is created equally. Make sure the feathering is natural looking and not “trying too hard”. Subject K (37 year old size 8 ) shows how one type of feathering makes her hips look wider, while the other type makes them look narrower.
Also, as good as front feathering and fading can be, back feathering or fading can do the opposite if it goes overboard. Subject B (29 year old size 5):
All butt fading is not evil. Slighter butt fading, as long as it is done naturally, can actually look nice. Subject I (36 year old size 2):
A lighter stitch color can add interest and minimize by breaking up the space. I’ve already shown you how that helped the pocket width illusion on Subject J:
But you can see that the stitching also lends to a more attractive front view as well:
Subject K has on the same style/brand of jeans, except that one pair has white stitching and the other doesn’t. See how the stitching helps minimize her thigh width:
Please let me know if you have any questions! I hope to add sequels in the future, including plus-sized and men’s jeans.
And don’t ever forget – if it doesn’t look right, it’s not you, it’s the jeans!!!
Special Thanks to:
- Subjects A through L for donating their bodies to denim science.
- My Mom, for invaluably handling the service of child crowd control
- Ali, who relished her role as children’s activity director. And also really enjoyed the backdrop and a certain pair of pink-stitched jeans.
For the rest of my denim posts:
If you’re afraid you might wear Mom Jeans and have Long Butt, click here.
If you’re over 50 years old, click here.
If you are wearing Gap or Old Navy jeans, click here.
If you are plus-sized and would like to find out how best to flatter your body, click here.
If you want a list of every post I’ve ever written about denim, click here.
Other Posts That Might Interest You…
Awwwww, I’d have surely loaned my badonkadonk and thunder thighs if I knew you were lacking in plus-sized models! Let me know if my butt is in neeed (if Vault makes jeans my size)!
I’ll definitely hit you up on the next round of tips!!
I need to make a trip up there for your next how-to. Baby’s got some serious back, and I have the hardest time finding jeans that fit without leaving a lovely gap. I could just start running again and lose a couple inches of tush, but driving 12 hours seems like a better idea.
Definitely come visit me!! We’d have such fun…
You did a great job! I don’t mind if you want to put my size. Do you want it? Or do you want it to stay a :) Thanks for all the tips! I look forward to you getting my bum in a good fit very soon!!
Ha!!! It the 8 and the ) had a scientific reaction and created a smiley! Is that considered a typo?? I had to put a space between then to get them to quit overreacting. Now it DOES look like a typo.
smokin’ hot, “subject K” ;)
Thank you, m’dear! ;)
Ages are hyphenated: a 29-year-old, not “a 29 year old.”
the only thing that could have made this post better is baby got back playing in the background. I love the transformations from old butt to new butt
Or actually flattering jeans…which the “correct ” ones are not. the but does look small, but the thighs look huge and stocky. You actually want the but to look bigger then your waist, and the legs to look slim and long, you know.
I need to learn how to jean shop with a friend, as I try jeans on and then squirm around in the mirror like crazy trying to get a good view of my butt to ensure it’s not a mombutt. Also, I really like your repeating message of “it’s not you, it’s the jeans”… I often have trouble with jeans being cut too trim in the thighs (mine are nicely muscled) once I get the size small enough for my butt and waist, and find that very frustrating. But see, now I know, it’s not me, it’s the jeans.
<3
Really good denim “specialists” will have you wear the pair of jeans around their store for 15 min or so to really make sure that they are the appropriate fit. So the “squirm around” idea is completely valid. :)
Yes. I typically make people squat, stoop, bend all the way over, sit, cross their legs, and anything else I can think of. Unfortunately, Monday was a crazyhouse day and I didn’t make Subject K go through all of those motions. So now I must start over with her and her jeans search. (Sigh) Sorry, Subject K.
I have never looked at so many women’s heinys before in all my life. I feel like I need to apologize to my husband. :}
I particularly liked the last picture. What a cutie pie. Thanks for all the tips. Would like to hear which brands were involved too.
Some brands I recommend:
Seven for All Mankind
Rock and Republic
William Rast (for a really nice skinny jean that’s not too tight)
PRVCY
Hudson
Citizens of Humanity
Red Engine
J Brand
If you’re looking for a specific fit or shape, let me know and I can be more specific!
Which of these are the most economical?
Buying through a Vault Denim party is the most economical choice, because they’re up to half off ($48-92). Here’s more information: http://www.graspingforobjectivity.com/vault-denim
If you’d like me to help you find a rep near you, let me know!
I love your blog! I have never heard of a vault jean party. I was hoping you could get me in touch with a rep, so I might be able to attend one. Thanks
Sure – what city/state are you in?
Could you throw out a quick brand/style recommendation for me? 5’10”, size 26/27 (or 2/4), slim muscular legs with wide hips plus a long looking yet bubbly butt but a tiny waist, and a tendency to have whale tale issues (not no gaping at the waist). I LOVE the Joe’s Honey Fit and they’re perfect, but I’m looking for other options to test out too.
Red Engine has some great jeans that come in at the waist and have plenty of room for the butt. Another great try would be J Brand.
Although I’m 4’11.5 and cannot help you out length-wise, I’ve found success with jeans that are designed to tummy tuck, such as Secretly Slender jeans by St. John’s Bay.
Love your insight! Do you have any suggestions for short legs? How much jean is ok to have around your ankles?
I highly recommend hemming jeans. I do it to all of mine, and it usually costs $10. Get them measured in your tallest shoes that you would wear them with, and have them hem the jeans to the point where they’re very nearly touching the ground.
St. John’s Bay has a good selection of jeans in petite sizes, although if you want colors other than blue you may have to look online. I find them at JC Penney’s. I usually get the “secretly slender” ones (designed to tummy tuck) because I have trouble with jeans either gaping at the waist or riding too low. I’m 4’11.5 and they are the right length for my legs.
I bought some of the St. John’s bay around January of 2016, they seem to fit real well. I am 5′ 7″ and am a bit chubby. Sears had a buy one get one sale, but no more than one per customer per day. Unfortunately I live over 2 hours from Sears and had no friends with me at the time so I could not get more. :(
I wear the brand Silver Jeans in the style Suki. They seem to be the best ones for me because I have a butt on me! lol What is your opinion of those?
Yes, they’re great! I relied on them heavily in a later post.
Sometimes you just have to go with an inadvertent blog identity. I wrote a few posts about some weight I lost a few years ago, and lo and behold, became a Weight Loss Blogger for a while. Definitely not what I was trying to be when I first started! But I went ahead and explored the territory, and it turned out to be fairly rewarding and interesting to write about the many (real) issues that this topic can raise.
You’re a humorous and sensible writer and could probably blog anything well. I think it’s good to listen to your audience and give them more of what they want, even if it surprises you at first!
Aw, thanks so much!! And you’re right – whatever your readers latch onto is a good indication of a good subject to go back to.
Very informative post!! Thanks for posting it!
I say we do one on Teen jeans?!?! And, I must say, I kinda wished I could have come to get my butt photographed!! :( (only to the see the difference of course! :) )
Teen Jeans would be good!! Except that I don’t know too many Mothers that want their teenager’s butts on my blog. Therefore, we face a conundrum.
Noo… don’t do teen jeans! Those little blighters look amazing in anything, it’s not fair!
actually, you would be surprised….sometimes Teenagers LACK style….
Hehe..I loved this! I wish I could have taken part! (I had originally volunteered my posterior to your cause, but unfortunately I don’t live locally.) Anyway, I recently wrote a post about how my butt has gone all flat since having kids, and that I can’t seem to get my jeans to stay up. (The unfortunate side effect of having a flat rump is that there’s no padding when you fall, so I also wrote about how I unfortunately broke my tailbone). But anyhoo, I posted a pic of my flat bum in a typical pair of jeans…I’d love your feedback! The post is called Broke Butt Mountain, and I guarantee you’ll laugh while reading it!
Due to my flat butt syndrome, I had actually recently contemplated having a butt vote on my blog, and getting rid of the jeans the readers liked the least. But then I thought…who wants to look at twenty pictures of my bum? Probably no one…except maybe my husband. But you know, after reading this post, I’m thinking of reconsidering! I sort of enjoyed comparing butts here!
Thanks for the fun, and have a great week!
Smiles, Jenn
You should definitely write that post!!! I’ll be glad to vote on your butt!
I have no idea what I am doing wrong, judging from the sizes you have listed and the body types. I see women with my same shape who can’t weigh a whole lot more than me, but they are in size 2, 4, 8….I have to buy at least a 12 or 14 now because of extreme discomfort in my abdomen from my fibromyalgia. Clothes can actually hurt me, especially around the waist.
I have been looking for jeans that fit properly and don’t hurt me for over two years and still haven’t found any. I ended up ordering two pair of maternity jeans (yes, really!) from The Gap and so far, they are the best fit for what’s going on with my middle. I also love lounge pants, pajamas, and sweat pants for that comfortable feeling. But I do so with I had a pair of jeans or two that I really loved. *sigh*
Chelle
http://www.lifeonthedomesticfront.blogspot.com
That’s because those aren’t their actual sizes. I was laughing out loud at those sizes. They look bigger then me and I wear a 12. They look huge compared to my daughter who is 5″4, 105 pounds and actually wears a 4 and no it isn’t the photos adding all of that extra weight. I expect they were too self-conscience to put their real sizes down.
And shame on the blogger for suggesting those horrid large too widely spaced pockets are just right for a women in her 50’s and 60’a as if they are suddenly not allowed to have cute butts. I dare say she will be singing a different tune when she reaches that age.
Made a comment and it disappeared, probably because I added my blog site within the message after already putting it in the info requested.
I see women who can’t be any bigger than me but wearing size 2 and 4 and I just don’t understand why this is possible! I have been searching for a good fitting pair of jeans for over two years. Anything touching me around my waist is actually painful because of my fibromyalgia, but I would so love to have just two pairs of jeans that fit me!
Can it not be touching at all? I can give you some brand recommendations for stretchy, non-binding waistbands, but to not be touching at all would be a conundrum.
Well, it can be touching. I have two pairs of maternity jeans that I can tolerate. And draw strings are fine, as long as there is no tightness. It seems to be the zippers and buttons that hurt. I don’t think it’s possible to have pants that don’t touch your abdomen, but if they made them, I would totally get them!
Hmm. My recommendation would be to try Seven for All Mankind – they have very generous waists, as well as very soft, flexible fabrics. Also Emerson Edwards has nice wide, soft waistbands, but they’re only available through Vault.
So I could order those through you? And how would you determine what the right size would be?
I love reading your posts about jeans! I have been using your simple jean lessons while shopping for a couple years now. I just wish I could get my mother to give up her long-butt Mom jeans, but, even after reading your blog, she is still stubbornly refusing to give them up.
Thank you!!
Some battles just can’t be won. I have had several women tell me that they prefer the Mom Jeans look, and how can you argue with that?
I saw a woman at the grocery store yesterday who was wearing jeans with high, big pockets that ended halfway down her butt. I wanted to tell her, “Stop wearing those jeans!”
There are so many times that I want to offer the service of an intervention to a complete stranger… but I just don’t have the guts to do it.
This is great! After all this training and body reshaping that has been going on for this half-marathon my reward is definitely going to be some fancy jeans.
Jeans are the best reward!!!
Great tips! I will definitely re-read this before jean shopping next time. I am totally regretting the timing of our Southern trip now! I should have waited until post-baby so you could have found me some jeans!!!
I think part of my discouragment with jeans is that I walk with my legs really close together (apparently) because in less than a year I wear a holes in them where my legs rub together. SOOO annoying! If I ever do find a pair I love I will have to buy 10!
Hmm… I don’t have a solution to that one. Inner-Thigh Chaps, perhaps?? :)
What about muffin top? If I go too loose they fall down. If I get them tight enough then I get muffin top. If I go high-waisted then it looks stupid.
You want mid-rise and well-fitted at the waist – i.e. not too tight. It’s a hard balance to find, but if you do, it makes a world of difference!
Man, I wish I could have been around for this! I would have definitely offered up my size 16 booty for an over-haul! I have thunder-thighs and a flat bum, so jeans shopping is a nightmare for me. I’m thinking the next trip you make to Nashville, you may just have to bring any and everything you have even close to my size!
I’ll be glad to!! Although I don’t make it to Nashville very often. I do like it up there, though!
Your original blue jean post was how I found this fun little blog of yours. A friend of mine posted it on FB about a month ago, and I’ve been reading ever since. It’s amazing how such seemingly minor little details make such a big difference when it comes to how jeans fit. I’m planning a fun little shopping trip after I lose 5 more pounds, and jeans are on the top of the list. I will keep your advice in mind.
That’s great!! New Blue Jeans are an awesome motivator… at least for me. :)
This is SO HELPFUL! The proximity of the pockets to the back seam makes a huge difference. I knew the pockets were important but I didn’t know the why, but now I do.
First: I would give up an organ of choice from my very own body to have Subject I’s butt in the “good” jeans!
Secondly: If only I lived near you, I would love to be one of your plus size models! I lost a LOT of weight over the last couple of years and could really use some assistance picking out jeans (really? all clothes! I’m stuck in the Mom jeans/yoga pants/old tshirts that don’t fit me anymore rut!)
Third: Always enjoy your posts! Your humor is fantastic!