In this digital age of presentations and tablets and electronic interfacing notes, we have lost the fine art of simple printing. Ink on paper. And archaic and environment-destroying though it may be, sometimes it is still necessary. I miss Kinko’s. All I wanted was a black and white coloring book – the one I told […]
Half Notes.
Okay. You guys have put up with not one, but two posts about running races in the past two weeks. And I am well aware of how obnoxious runners are to non-runners. I was a staunch non-runner for 32.75 years and had zero intentions of ever becoming a runner and would’ve totally told that joke, […]
If My Life Were a Children’s Book.
Friday If you want to get a haircut, you ask your Mother-In-Law to come watch the kids. If your Mother-in-Law comes to watch the kids, your youngest is sure to ham it up and play especially sick. If your youngest hams it up and plays especially sick, she will tell you he didn’t get off […]
Why I Quit Bathing My Kids.
My friends of the Daily Child Bather Variety (which thankfully are rare) cannot understand people like me. They’re still in denial that the facts prove that most people are indeed like me but since I’m open and vocal about my anti-bathing stance, I must take the brunt of their shock. But here’s a little story […]
The Unpaved Road to Kid’s Market.
This has been my permanent position this week. Because I’ve begun the process of consigning. For the first time in my life. With eight years of children’s clothes to wash, sort, match, pin, tag, and tape. Take special notice of the container of apple juice on the coffee table, where children have begun to resort […]
She’s That Kind of Mom.
Sometimes you get lucky, and it’s sunny and 60 degrees on a Saturday in February. It might even look miraculously green outside, as if your dream of stepping into a time machine to take you to Spring actually occurred. You get even luckier when you have the time and the forethought to go on a […]
What Really Happened In Eufaula.
This past weekend, I felt compelled to return to the scene of the crime. My crime. The Place: Lakepoint State Park in Eufaula, Alabama. The time: One year ago. My conviction: Utter selfishness. My sentence: a year of guilt. I never really told my story. How I actually felt that weekend…because it would have been […]
Where Shopping is Not A Pleasure.
Editor’s Note: “Buggy” is the correct way to say “shopping cart”. I know that not all of you agree, but I cannot force myself to type shopping cart twenty-four times. That’s exactly 168 more characters than are needed. A character savings that I just lost with this explanation. 1:40pm: Walk through the parking lot of […]
That Time I Fought Captain Hook and Won (Sorta).
On Sunday night, Chris and I watched the next to last episode of Once Upon a Time’s Season Three. It featured a lot of Captain Hook (Also known as the beautiful and charming Killian Jones), along with a good deal of time travel. My subconscious was greatly impacted by these things. The first time I […]
A Christmas Story.
I hate that movie because it’s a train wreck. And I despise all train wreck movies – Ben Stiller and Chevy Chase are my nemeses. Yet, I set myself up. Saying that we needed to reorganize Christmas by illnesses, then post-scripting it with a “no really I’m just kidding – we’ll all be okay by […]