On Having (and Finding) My Celebrity Twin.

It wasn’t an option, really. I had to find her.

The number of Facebook messages, texts, tweets, and in-person comments was rising so quickly that I just started assigning people a number.

“Hey! Have you seen that Nokia Lumia commercial…”

“You’re number thirteen.”

“Oh. So it’s not you?”

“Nope.”

I could see what they saw, although I thought she looked like a much prettier and younger version of myself. And really, it was more in the mannerisms than anything, so I was getting a lot more questions from people I know in real life than I was from my blog readers.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uELoogRgvo4

I live for a good investigative assignment, especially one that involves a healthy bit of stalking, so finding my new doppelgänger definitely qualified as a worthy use of my time.

Plus, all the people I used to look like had waned in their fame, so I’d gotten bored with life without a celebrity lookalike.

It wasn’t an easy assignment – there’s no imdb for commercial actresses, and since the commercial in question was fairly new, all of the blogs that specialized in such hadn’t gotten to it yet.

The only lead I’d found was a name that a YouTube commenter had suggested as a possibility: Jo Armeniox.

I Google Imaged her and fairly quickly wrote her off. Her face didn’t seem to match up with the commercial – Jo was way more glamorous. But just in case, I checked twitter: she was there, but hadn’t tweeted in over a year – so clearly, there were no tweets about being on set filming for Nokia.

I gave up the search for a couple of weeks, until I ran into one of my former college professors. And the first thing he said was “Hey! There’s this commercial…”

Did you catch that? A College Professor! I took his classes 13 years ago. Yet this actress looked so much like me (or at least college me) that someone I knew over a decade ago thought of me when he saw it.

So I rekindled my research with renewed determination. I found another lead, suggesting that the actress in the commercial was the same actress that had a part in a certain television show. I imdb’ed the show and examined every single actress that had ever been on any season – I scoured dozens of women’s photos.

Near the very bottom of the cast list was Jo Armeniox.

I couldn’t ignore it as a coincidence, so I pulled up her Google Images again. As I was staring at the rows of pictures dubiously, Chris walked into my office and peeked over my shoulder.

“Good GRIEF that girl looks like you!!”

I didn’t see it, but he looks at me more than I look at me, so I began the microscopic comparison of Jo versus the Nokia Lumia girl.

I enlarged the photos as much as possible and started my exam. Eyebrow to eyebrow, upper lip to upper lip, lower lip to lower lip, dimple to dimple.

She had probably never been raked over so thoroughly in her life.

Finally, I declared Commercial Girl to be Jo Armeniox. Not because I thought she looked like Jo Armeniox, but because the microscopic details of her features matched up too perfectly not to be Jo Armeniox.

Photographical DNA doesn’t lie.

I peeked at her twitter account again and, as fate would have it, she had decided to start tweeting again – less than 24 hours prior.

Clearly we were meant to chat.

So I popped the question.

And my eyebrow examination had paid off – I had located my twin.

We chatted back and forth on Twitter, and I asked her for her email address to chat further.

In the meantime, she went to Europe for Christmas, and Chris and I watched clips from all of her television appearances and one of her movies, My Best Day, to ensure thoroughness in our research.

Jo and I caught back up after Christmas, and she sent me some pictures and answered my questions. Receiving photos from one’s actress-lookalike is a curiously disturbing sensation, because she really does look exactly like I imagine myself to look. But then when I put one of my own pictures next to her, I realize how far I actually am from my imagined self. I’ve never even noticed my chin line before but now I really want Jo’s.

The interview was delightful. Like my last interview (with Moist), I found it fascinating to be awarded a peek into someone’s life that was so different than my own.

1. How did you get into the film industry? Or what inspired you to do so?

I got into the film industry after growing up doing a lot of theater in North Carolina. I went to school at the University of the Arts and then moved to NY where I thought I would be doing a lot of theater. I have not done any theater in NY to this day! Not that I didn’t want to, it was more that I couldn’t afford to pay my rent! So I think I just put more energy into film and TV because that’s where I saw myself working.

2. How old are you? Any siblings? Did your parents ever mention anything about a mysterious older sister? Do you have any Greek relatives? My family is from Kalamata, Greece. I told my Mom and Dad this was their last chance to confess if I had a younger sister I didn’t know about before I talked to you, and they didn’t admit to anything.

I won’t tell you how old I am lol. I don’t have any siblings and desperately longed for them (even to this day!) No one mentioned any long lost older sister, however but my Grandfather was Greek and his family came in from the island of Chios(?!)

(For the record, I mapped the journey between Jo’s Grandfather’s hometown and my Great-Grandfather’s hometown – it’s across the Aegean Sea. So if there were any inter-family relational scandals going on, they were taking a Ferry to make it happen.)

4. I noticed that most of your roles seem to be troubled women – gamblers, murderers, et cetera. Is this your choice, or are us brunettes typecast as bad guys? I need to know this just in case I decide to have a career change. One must properly prepare to be evil.

Often I identified more with being the recluse, or the damaged, or “bad girl.” I’ve always considered myself a strong woman, but a lot of times strong women are written as villains because society still has trouble understanding women as well-rounded, complex human beings. A lot of my actor friends joked with me when they found out I had a recurring role on Boardwalk Empire saying “So are you a slut or a saint?” Nothing against Boardwalk of course, it’s more about how society views female characters. I like to work as hard as possible to be a fearless actor, and often that means taking chances with more troubled characters.

Side note: you are not allowed to go into the entertainment business because you will take work from me!

5. How many creepy male stalkers have you picked up so far? Thanks to the internet, there are way too many of those around even for Mommy Bloggers – let alone for actresses. Yeesh.

I’ve picked up my fair share of creepy male stalkers. I don’t think they realize it’s creepy. Or maybe I’m just trying to justify their sketchy behavior. There are some people who can’t separate the actor from the role. That bothers me but it kind of comes with the business. I also have a tendency to be kind to people I don’t know, and I HAVE to quit that already. So this interview is done.

Just kidding.

6. What’s the most embarrassing, funny, or fascinating thing that’s ever happened while filming?

Hmmm well, I don’t embarrass easily for some reason, but I think the most fascinating thing that has ever happened while filming was working on the show “Unforgettable.” When shooting a TV show, particularly primetime and on a major network, things tend to move really fast. There isn’t a terrible amount of room (if any) for exploring or improv, because well, time is money and you only have around 15 days to shoot an episode.

Anyways, I was doing a scene with Michael Gaston that was really emotional and intense. We did a number of takes, got through most of the scene in terms of coverage, all was going well. Then on my second or third close up Michael took a turn and went completely off book.  He was calling me names, cursing at me and really drilling me. It escalated and I got angry and punched a table. After we cut everyone started clapping and laughing. We referred to it as the “European take.” I felt honored that he decided to improv and play within the scene with me. I would like to think it’s a way of showing trust and respect for a lot of actors.

7. What would be your dream role?

Dream role. Let’s see. Strong female lead seems a bit obvious, but it’s true. Characters that are leaders and fighters. I like to play provocative characters. I like characters that push boundaries, I could even go as far to say characters that make people uncomfortable. Those characters that are evil, addicts, sexual and tough fascinate me, and I think are dream role worthy. I think ultimately having my own work produced, having creative input on my own series would be the dream job.

8. Do Nokia phones really take that good of pictures? ;-)

Nokia phones take INCREDIBLE pictures!!! No kidding!!

---

And that, dear internet, is how one goes about stalking their twin.