Need a great Daycare? In Birmingham, we have only the best:

…I bet those kids take GREAT naps.

We were browsing through the baby section the other night and ran across belly mold kit – you know, so you can always remember exactly how gargantuan pregnancy makes you.

Although we didn’t buy it, we learned a few things from the packaging. Such as, apparently it takes a village to rub on said mold:


…I wonder if they drew straws to determine who got to do each…um…bump.

Pretty much everyone in the world (but me) chooses to quantify their family in little white stickers on the backs of their cars.

But the problem is, those stickers leave marks if something needs to be…changed. I’ve seen a few Daddies scratched off the backs of cars, but this removal(s) brought up SO many more questions than answers:


Disney’s licensing department has always made sure that every product possible in every store on the earth has been smeared with their branding. But apparently, one of them realized that they weren’t in grocery stores and had a panic attack:

…but it’s undeniable that they DO know what they’re doing – I had to take that photo as discreetly as possible so that Ali didn’t eye those grapes and beg me to buy them ALL in hopes that she, too, would turn into a Princess.

There’s something so inherently wrong with selling Margaritas at the drive-thru… AND with buying Margaritas from Taco Bell in the first place:


Feeling self-conscious about your abs lately? I certainly would be about mine, were it not for the fact that I have none.

But if you are, for only $69, you too can have a makeup kit that, I’m sure, would transform your abs AND your life:

photo3 …I wonder how I’d look with painted-on abs over my extraordinarily protruding pregnant belly?

A family that we go to church with owns the best septic cleaning company in town. They are so thorough, in fact, that when they get back to their headquarters with your septic system’s contents, they apparently separate it back out by it’s originally deposited form:

IMG_0523 copy Now THAT’S service.

20 thoughts on “Across My Path as of Late.

  1. I'm quite certain that those Taco Bell frozen "margaritas" are the pregnant lady/driving friendly kind ;). At least I hope…..

  2. I love these! I can't imagine letting all of those people touch my belly while pregnant (or ever really). I do want to see pictures of the "day care" facility.

  3. I drive by that daycare & sign all the time and it always makes me laugh!

    The preggo belly mold sounds like a good small group project, we'll let Chris do the "bumps" :)

    Ryan always makes fun of the family stickers on cars, that particular one is quite intriguing!

  4. I did the belly cast and I loved every second of it, even though I was HUGE! It was really fun to do and even more fun to see "that's what I looked like"! I'm still amazed when I look at it…my lil guy fit in there. And it was really fun to put him in it after he was born. I put his handprints and footprints on it (right where his foot always stuck out of my side). I look at it more than I do his ultrasound pics…it represents both of us and I'm still amazed I was so big :)

  5. Oh, and only Jeremy and my sister-in-laws participated. And there was no "rubbing" involved! It was many, many layers of gauge soaked in plaster goo, but it didn't take long to dry! Just in case it was the rubbing that was turning you off!

  6. this might be one of my favorite posts of yours! They all make me laugh but this one was absolutely hysterical! Thanks, as always, for the laugh!

  7. You have totally blogged about the answer to those family stickers! It is the "perfect" Disney family: The mother (or better yet the EVIL STEPmother) somehow met her untimely demise, leaving three beautiful children, a furry friend for each of them, the King, and his butler. Mystery SOLVED!
    As for the belly mold… while it is intriguing, I have always wondered what you do with it when it is completed. Are there appropriate mounts for such things?

  8. Belly caste- creepy.
    Sticker families – maybe the outline is there because they only visit every other weekend?
    Grapes- Brilliant! Except for the fact that they were probably twice the price. Note to self: Put princess stickers on broccoli.
    Abs- This cracked me up. "The groundbreaking cosmetic body sculpting kit". It's groundbreaking? Really?

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