24: season seven logo.
Chris loves it…

I used to love it…

But after two seasons, I realized that it stressed me out so much that I might need medication if I watched another episode. Just hearing the mere “beep, BEEP, beep, BEEP” of the intro and before and after every stinkin’ commercial break literally makes my heart race with anxiety and dread of WHAT’S GOING TO GO WRONG NEXT.

(Actually, just THINKING the “beep, BEEP, beep, BEEP” makes my heart race. I’m telling you – the continued existence of this show is not good for my mental well-being.)

But, Chris still loves it. And I don’t want to miss out on our night times alone. So, when the dreaded time slot arrives, I sit in the living room, feet entwined with his, but eyes and ears two inches from my laptop, trying my DARNDEST to tune out the carnage happening on his Male Soap Opera.

And so, I present my case.

12 Reasons that I hate 24.

  1. They make it up as they go along – the writers actually admitted a few years ago that they only have a few weeks planned out at a time, and they make the rest up as they come up with “cool” ideas.

    For someone who likes continuity and an overarching plan, this is TORTUROUS. Yet not surprising….

  2. For instance, in the last season that I cared about, they wasted three hours (aka THREE WEEKS of episodes) recovering an mp3 that Jack had, but let get taken back. He had it for at least an hour before losing it.

    C’mon, people – if he’s really superman, he would have TOTALLY recorded it onto something else or played it over the phone to let someone else record it or SOMETHING. Those three hours were unabashed time fillers that I will never be able to recover.

  3. The show is supposed to be in real time for 24 hours. If that’s the case, why does no one ever pee?? Ever tried holding your bladder for 24 hours? That’s what I thought.
  4. I have a lot of issues with this whole real time thing. For instance: flights across country take 15 minutes.
  5. And driving a car across Los Angeles take 2 minutes.
  6. Also, Jack always happens to be in the exact city that a crisis is about to take place – whether that city is LA, NY, DC, Africa, or Needles, Arizona.
  7. And the most annoying time issue – every the-world-is-about-to-end crisis always resolves in exactly 24 hours.

    But if it DOES resolve sooner, then there just HAS to be another crisis. And the two combined will equal … exactly 24 hours.

  8. Chloe O’Brian always looks like she just smelled the worst aroma ever concocted by a human, and she’s covertly looking both ways, trying to find out if it was the person at the console on the left…or on the right.



  9. Everyone in the world, good or bad, is related to Jack. Seriously – how many relatives can one man have that are on one side or the other of every terroristic plot on the face of this good earth??
  10. The ticking is so anxiety-inducing that I fear it will make me tear out a brick wall, Edgar Allen Poe Tell-Tale Heart Style.
  11. The violence. Apparently, there are golden tickets in the television industry, and if you get it, you’re not subject to normal rules of decency. For instance, 24 got the Violence Golden Ticket. Grey’s Anatomy and Desperate Housewives split the Sexual Content Golden Ticket. Oh – and Jersey Shore got the “Really??? People Actually LIVE LIKE THAT?!!?!?” Golden Ticket.
  12. There’s NEVER a truly happy ending. Nor will there ever be. Even Chris, deep down in his soul, would trade watching a whole season just to give Jack Bauer 24 hours of peace and happiness. In episode one of this year, he was already saying “C’mon, Jack, get on the plane with your daughter!! Leave it all behind!! Fly, Jack!! Fly!!! Fly far, far away!!!”

    Of course, Jack chose to stay and fix the crisis-that-couldn’t-possibly-be-solved-without-Jack. And of course, this season, like all the others, will end up with Jack getting the snot beat out of him – for the TWENTY-FOURTH time of the season.

Face it – It’s not going to happen. Jack will never get a full night’s sleep, will never get to pee, and will NEVER be happy or well-adjusted. And Chloe will never quit smelling loathsome and offensive odors.

24 thoughts on “12 Reasons that I hate 24.

  1. Wow I have never seen the show and don't think I will now, although just from the commercials I sit and wonder if poor Jack will ever actually get to be "out" of the business. He seems to retire every year only to be pulled back in.

    If you had shows that make it up as the go along don't ever watch Lost, although this is it's final season. I am convinced the writers make it up as they go along depending on what the fan blogs and message boards say. I love "Lost" though!

  2. I am so glad to hear that I am not the only person that does not like this show! I did like it for a season, but I, like you, just can't take the anxiety the show causes me! Plus, you can't get too attached to anyone other than Jack and Chloe because they are going to die. I do like Creepy Chloe though, her constant I just smelled something nasty face always made me laugh.

  3. I love 24! If I could only watch 1 show all year long 24 would be that show.

    I won't take up a lot of space refuting your reasons (although I totally could :), but I will say that your Edgar Allen Poe reaction to the ticker is about as bizarre as my inability to watch a close football game.

  4. I have friends that live for 24. I watched it one season and thought I ws going to have to be committed…so I'm with you. It's waaaaay to stressful. Anyway – I have enough drama in my life. Amen?

  5. Hey, do you hate 24??? I can't get into that show but my Dad LOVES it! I'll take all my silly reality shows any day of the week. I would love for you to watch the Bachelor or America's Next Top Model with me one day and hear your comments!

  6. The last season I watched was when Jack wore jeans and a thermal shirt until the last episode. I can't stand it anymore!

    Yes, Chloe is possibly one of the least attractive women I have ever seen.

  7. I watched season one episode one. I just couldn't get into either. But I commend you on sitting through it with your husband!

  8. Ditto! I was dying when I read "Male Soap Opera" that explains it PERFECTLY. Chloe always has that constipated look on her face that drives me nuts too.

    My husband watches it every week and he gets mad when I start laughing at the lack of continuity and predictability in the show and then kindly asks me to stop watching if I am going to criticize his show. This of course makes me want to giggle even more.

  9. Amen!! As a FORMER 24 follower I couldn't agree more. We watched it for several seasons. Then quit. The violence was the straw that broke the camel's back for us. We now have very peaceful hours on Monday nights.

  10. Aaaannnndddd the additional Golden Ticket for Sex? It totally goes to Private Practice. I HATE that show. . .Who hasn't slept with whom?! I've never seen 24 (I know, I live a sheltered life.), but over Christmas, Kev & I got to watching reruns of the Unit. I hate how there's a cliffhanger at the end of every episode. . .but we always go back.

  11. I loved the very first season of that show but when the second season started it only held my attention for about two episodes. I haven't seen one since…and it looks like that was a good decision! :)

    This makes me glad we don't have tv!

  12. Amen 12 times over!! I am with you on this one!

    The first year we were married Ryan's sister gave him the 1st season of 24 on DVD and I watched about half of it with him, which was a HUGE mistake…I literally had nightmares for weeks!

    I can't ever watch something scary, intense, violent, etc. w/o getting scared afterwards, so I have no idea what possessed me to watch the show to begin with!

    Since then, anytime he's watching 24 I have to leave the room b/c just hearing what's going on will give me nightmares!

    I did, however, come in and out of the room the 1st season that Chloe was in, and I always thought what in the world is wrong with her, she always has some sort of scowl on her face, she must be a VERY unhappy person!

    Sunday night after the kids went to bed, Ryan turned on 24 and begged me to stay in the room with him, so I got on the computer and tried my hardest to get lost in blog reading and pay no attention to the TV…that lasted for about 10 minutes (when Jack got tasered by the policeman), and then I had to retreat to our bedroom and watch something happy so I would not have nightmares.

  13. I watched the entire first season and when it ended, swore I would never watch it again. Honestly, it's DEPRESSING!!! :P

  14. I watched it for a couple seasons and then couldn't take it anymore. Too ridiculous. And I think Chloe is like the female Napoleon Dynamite.

  15. I've never watched the show, but encountered that annoying beep, BEEP to make me steer clear! Did you know that repetitive noises are a OCD pet peeve of mine?

  16. NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

    I saw your title and was almost afraid to keep reading. I was vehemently opposed to getting involved in 24 and then one day a friend lent us the season, and the next four days were history.

    I feel a little sad that you aren't a 24 fan, but I understand your reasoning and am willing to extend a little grace…on this one occasion only, of course. =)

    We get whole seasons at a time for about $8 – don't let anyone fool you into believing that the country I live in supports Intellectual Property Rights…don't believe it for a second!

    But on vacation or when we really need a break from the everyday drama here, we pop in 24. Unfortunately, we have to wait til it's over in America before it will start appearing on store shelves here.

    Hey – speaking of Chloe – I about freaked out a few months ago when I was watching Sweet Home Alabama and there was CHLOE sitting behind the bank counter with some nasty huge bangs! Hahahahaa

    Even in light of this revelation, I'm still willing to continue our friendship. Just don't drop any more bombshells on me for a while… =)

  17. I am ROFL at your smelling Chloe comment:)

    I tried watching this a while back, and I definitely had some of the same issues you had. Driving 0.25 miles in L.A. could take well over an hour on most days!

  18. There are many shows where I have to wait until the season is over and/or the next season starts before I watch. Some shows literally give me tachycardia and I have to wait and let myself be spoiled before I can watch them.

  19. Everyone says they LOVE season 5. I enjoyed it until the terrorists were caught. Then, I could tell that the writers are making it up as they go along.
    One episode had martha and Mike Novik have a 15 minute conversation that led to nowhere. Then, Aaron and Martha had annoyngly long sessions of interactions where she says something and Aaron keeps a stoic face!

    Then the recording that jack got after being responsible for SO MANY people’s death is not played immediately in front of important people of CTU. It is handed off to Chloe to process it ALL BY HERSELF!

    Chloe, who was able to sniff out a mole in 2 seconds in this season and shoot intruders in the previous one, was suddenly inept against Miles’ devious ways!

    They suddenly make competent people become careless and idiotic to make the plot stretch for 24 episodes
    There is ALWAYS a mole inside the CTU. The head of CTU is ALWAYS wrong.

    Anyway, I stopped watching after season 5.

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