Dear Parents that have yet to reach tooth-pulling age, I owe you an apology. And a grave warning. In December of 2012, after only three weeks of Ali having her first loose tooth, I penned the following paragraph: “Shocked at her sudden burst of bravery, I quickly grabbed the napkin, reached in, and popped it […]
The Recipe For Educational Calamity.
The Pumpkin Patch Field Trip of your Nightmares. Yield: 15 Exasperated Mothers and 58 Screaming Children. Prep Time: Longer than you can possibly conceive. Calories: Certainly enough will be burned to justify mass chocolate consumption for the following seven days. Directions: 1. Wake your children from their restful slumber in order to arrive on time. […]
Moist: On Meeting Daze.
On Friday, I shared the majority of my interview with Moist, a Birmingham graffiti artist. However, the last question I asked had such a fascinating answer that I saved it for a post of its own. I asked Moist if he had ever met Daze, another graffiti artist whose tags I see all over town, […]
The World’s Greatest Infomercial Suckers.
Let’s talk. So despite the colossal changes in our world due to the internet, infomercials still exist. Which means, they must work. And not only do they exist, but the phrase “As Seen on TV” somehow adds enough credibility for marketers to print it on the packaging of an entire aisle of drug store paraphernalia. […]
Alabama’s Shopping Theme Park.
I’ve always wanted to go there. Once even, we were in the area and on our way – then realized it was Sunday and they were closed. But last Friday, I finally got the opportunity to go to the National Mecca of deals shopping. And it was marvelous, so I’m going to take you on […]
How To Stay Dry in the Rain.
1. Steal your sister’s junk-hoarding bucket. 2. When she catches you, act like you did nothing wrong and didn’t even realize she was chasing you. 3. Steal your sister’s other junk-hoarding bucket. 4. Skip around in the rain, satisfied at your complete dryness. 5. But beware – rain is slippery. 6. Don’t fall. 7. If […]
You’ve Gotta Start Somewhere.
So yesterday, we began. Noah was slightly perturbed about being labeled as a troublemaker on the first day, But he couldn’t deny that there was just cause for that assumption. And no, I didn’t take a “first day of school” picture last year with which to compare these. And yes, that fact does indeed eat […]
I Saw a Bear.
Need I say more? Oh wait – yes, yes I do. Because I saw a bear – and her tiny, precious newborn bear. Less than thirty feet from our car. If it weren’t for the phrase “Mama Bear” being common vernacular, I would have totally scooped that baby up into my arms and cuddled with […]
Theories Behind Tire Explosions.
I got sideswiped by The Knight Bus yesterday. And really, it had to happen to someone. Have you seen its ludicrous speeds and maneuvers? No, I guess you haven’t, since it’s invisible to Muggles, and I’m pretty sure that Hermione and Harry aren’t regular blog readers. (But Luna Lovegood totally is.) So. I was coming […]
The Rest of the Trip.
I wrote about Disney (or the lack thereof). I wrote about LegoLand. But there was a lot of space on either ends of those experiences that deserve documenting. So here is, albeit late, my last accounting of our trip to Orlando. The best purchase that I made before we left was this method of transporting […]