“You know what the world needs more of today? Rainbows and Unicorns.”
These were my thoughts when I opened up Facebook.
Two minutes into my feed…
“Unicorns. Rainbows. Stat.”
Five minutes in…
“I NEED A UNICORN CRAPPING A RAINBOW THIS INSTANT.”
I opened up my Bitmoji app to try and find the picture of my cartoon self doing just that,
…Only to discover that my Bitmoji front page looked just like my Facebook feed.
And then I remembered.
I had just the thing that I needed. Nay, perhaps what all of America needed. Or all of the world.
This summer, we discovered something quite accidentally. Noah was playing with the hose in the bright summer sunshine, and I noticed the effect.
I ran in and got my camera and pleaded, begged, and bribed him to let me take pictures.
“PLEASE let me take a picture of a rainbow coming out of your butt. I’ll buy you THREE pieces of candy if you’ll let me take a picture of a rainbow coming out of your butt!!!!”
The pictures weren’t perfect, so I never shared them (except with a friend who has an especially strange penchant for unicorns pooping rainbows.)
My plan was to recreate it again and try to get the arc just right and make sure the end of the rainbow connected from where it was supposed to come just so.
But alas, the summer got away from us and I never worked on my photography project.
But that’s okay.
Because America just needs rainbows today. Not perfect rainbows – just any old rainbow will do.
Therefore, I hereby declare it National Day of Rainbows and Unicorns.
So here you go.
He’s no unicorn, but he can poop a rainbow. So basically, he’s a unicorn.
And if you still need more Unicorns Pooping Rainbows, then by all means watch this:
So go out there and spread some rainbow and unicorn love. Send me your cute kids, your puppies, your funny videos, and for sure share if you have someone or something pooping a rainbow.
That’s all I got, America.