Really, it should have a slogan.

“Circumcision: Making newborn boys hate diaper changes since Genesis 17.”

It was the part of having a boy that I least looked forward to.  As if new babies aren’t shocked enough by their entrance into the outside world, let’s REALLY give them something to be shocked about!

Now granted, I certainly didn’t dread it enough to become an Intactivist and make him wear embarrassing onesies such as these:




(Thanks to Marty for introducing me to this concept…I had no idea that Intactivists even existed before she enlightened me – after all, it takes a while for trends such as this one to make it all the way down here to Alabama.)

…but nonetheless, I wasn’t looking forward to it.

And, although putting Vaseline on “it” every time the diaper is changed is supposed to help “it”, I am positive that Noah very clearly informed us that no, it was not a pleasant feeling AT ALL to be smeared with thick goo.

But, luckily for me, since it’s fairly impossible to change diapers easily after having a C-Section, I got a 5 day reprieve from having to deal with his injuries.

And really, luckily for Noah, too.

Because when I DID take up my diaper changing duties, I didn’t make it any easier on the poor kid.

You see, Vaseline is pretty thick stuff.  And so you have to squeeze the tube with all your might to get it to squirt out.

And you see, in the dark, the Vaseline and Desitin (diaper rash cream) tubes look exactly the same.

But, Desitin comes out of the tube a WHOLE lot more willingly.  ESPECIALLY if you give it a Vaseline-strengthed squeeze.

And so, one fateful middle-of-the-night last week, poor Noah found himself topped with half a tube of Desitin where I was SUPPOSED to have put Vaseline.

And, apparently, Desitin feels even worse than the intended topper.

And, just to make things worse, the act of Mommy trying desperately to scoop up half a tube of Desitin off of aforementioned injury feels EVEN INFINITELY WORSE.

Poor kid.  Doesn’t even know what one is, but he’s totally wishing I were an Intactivist.

34 thoughts on “The Difference Between Boys and Girls.

  1. Awwww, poor thing! I’m sure you felt absolutely horrible about it too! Congrats on the birth of your little one! We’ve been out of town for awhile, so I’ve been behind on checking blog posts and I must have missed your announcement!

  2. LOL, Bless his heart….I mean wiener. Jameson was in NICU for 3 weeks after he was born, so they decided to do his procedure about an hour before they took his hospital pictures. Nice.

  3. oh yes. the foreskin mommies. since we use cloth diapers I’m part of an online group of people that unfortunately includes A LOT of very vocal hippy/crunchy Intactivists that unashamedly made me feel extremely guilty about Salem’s circ. I know them all too well!!
    Just keep pulling it back and applying that vaseline! and keep doing it even when you think it’s all healed (not the vaseline part…just the pulling back part!) because it could so happen that just when you think all is well, it has in fact become re-attached (oh yes) and then you have to go back to the doc and have it re-cut. I may or may not have been guilty of that, subjecting my son to even more pain.
    awful. it was awful.

  4. Oh, his poor little wee-wee. That’s what we call it around here anyway. Having three boys I know how horrible it is to see your baby go off for that procedure. I cried all three times and could not wait to get them back to me.

    One thing I did was to squirt the vasoline all over the front of the diaper in the appropriate wee-wee touching place. Then just put on his diaper. Maybe it is the direct contact and the smearing it on that is bothering him. Just a thought.

  5. Bless you both! Thankfully this too shall pass. Neither my Pedi, the nurses, nor the OB who performed the “procedure” ever informed me that it neeed to be pulled back at each changing…I just thought you had to slather the jelly on. Thanks guys. Slight adhesion, but thankfully no surgery needed. Sheesh!

    Oh the joys of changing a boy’s diaper! Definitely won’t miss it this time around…

  6. Oddly enough my son never had a problem with his circ… he was actually asleep when they brought him back from the procedure! And he was more upset about the cold wipies (it was a VERY cold December when he was born) than the vaseline. Though it sounds like he was the exception! Poor little Noah! And poor Mommy!

    Don’t worry, he will get his revenge in the classic I-am-a-boy-and-I-pee-whenever-air-touches-me diaper change procedure. Be prepared to be sprinkled upon. Often. When you least expect it. And often when you DO expect it, but don’t quite move fast enough.

  7. Oh, I can so sympathize! I felt so, so bad about it and it was one of the things I felt grateful about in having a girl the next time. (Of course, girls come with their own sets of issues, but at least we can put that off for about 12 years!) I have a couple of friends who choose not to circumcise (and who were pretty vocal about how barbaric they think it is), but my mom is a nurse and she has seen grown men who have to be cut as adults because of medical problems – she was pretty convincing when she warned that it is MUCH, MUCH worse to have it done at 30 or 40! As a mom, it is brutal to see on a baby, though. On the up side, at least he won’t ever remember anything about it.

  8. And regarding “pulling it back”: I think it depends on what procedure they use to do the circ., as there are a number of different ways to do it. My doctor said to only use a bit of Vaseline and no need to touch it, but my nephew had a different doc and his was done an entirely different way – using a string, I think. His mom had slightly different care instructions. They both ended up looking pretty much the same, though :)

    1. From someone who “won’t ever remember anything about it”, I am very disappointed that my parents (mother was a nurse) made the decision (and told so). I did find out that there was NO decision made other than, “everyone else was doing it”.

      Don’t forget for a minute that the infant today will be the men of tomorrow. Although they might not remember, perhaps they may regret a quick decision made by their parents.

      It’s a funny thing that today less than 50% of males are circumcised and yet the fear of humiliation by peers makes parents opt for cosmetic surgery.

      We in America have even made a law to prevent any genital “corrections” on our daughters. Why? Perhaps they should look like mother, or it looks funny, or yuck.

      1. The Unheard,
        i would have to agree with you as far as the “decision” parents have to make and their kids(now men) regret such a decision.
        i dont have a boy, i have 2 girls instead but i am married to a men who was circumcised and he truly “resents” his parents for the decision.
        When i brought up the topic to him when i was expecting my second daughter, he was more than willing to look into it and say “No, we have to stop this trend with me” because i always thought he would have to be the one to decide.
        I dont have a penis, so how can i know how bad that cosmetic surgery hurts? He has one and knows how sensitive that area is so if God blesses us with a baby boy, we aren’t going to circumcise him.
        I just hope that the info keeps spreading to many mothers and fathers and that they can see that they have a second choice. i think it is pretty amazing that since 2005 the percentage has dropped from 58% to 32% and it keeps dropping. :)

  9. I do not have boys, so not qualified to talk about the “procedure.” However, have done many stupid things while trying to care for babies in the dark. SO…bwahahahahah! Been there, done that, so sorry!

  10. I am an intactivist but since i dont have boys i dont go around telling people what they should do or what they should have done.
    Certainly, men born in my country (as well in most Latin Countries) and in Europe (at least the majority) are intact too so it is not uncommon to be intact.
    We just need to teach our boys/men to “pull back and clean” every day, just like we (women) do to not get infections and to be clean.
    I feel bad for Noah, having to go through this. i can only imagine how uncomfortable it must be.
    Like, i said, i dont go around telling women what to do as far as their unborn sons but if i would have known you a lot longer maybe, i could have send you an article while you were still pregnant so you could explore the options.
    i dont have any advice on how to make “it” easier for diaper changes, i just can pray that it wont “reattach” like some moms have said here.
    HUGS and keep up the good work.
    PS. you may need a wee wee teepee thingy. it is little cone made of fabric to prevent those crazy “spray on” boys do.

  11. Oh poor thing! Good thing he is too little too remember! I accidentally scratched S’s face last night and it bled! Hurts a Mommy’s heart.

    This is the main reason I am scared to have a boy! This seems so foreign to me! We will be doing the procedure if we get a boy b/c I left it up to my husband. I also only know one couple who didn’t do it and their son got some terrible infection b/c of it and had to have major surgery (very painful!) at age 4. But my main thought is that if God put it in the bible, it was probably for a good reason. :)

    Are those shirts really for sale?? Poor boys. That is just TMI.

  12. I love having little boys, I hate having to deal with that aspect. I had no idea the first time around that there was so much maintenance to those things. I think the trade off is when they are preteens we don’t have to talk to them about tampons or maxi pads. :)

  13. Poor Noah, ouch! Ryan had to change Luke’s diapers the first day or two after his surgery (at 6 months old) because I was so grossed out by it…not looking forward to it this time around either!

  14. Being a girl myself and having our firstborn be a girl, that whole situation with Grayson made me nervous. I’m pretty sure I used about half a tube of vaseline with each diaper change. He survived with no ill effects and so did I.

    By the way, I love the random comment(s) from the Intactivists, as if they know what’s better for YOUR child than you do. :)

  15. Sorry, but I just laughed as I read your post. At least he is too small to remember and I bet now you have your desitin and vasoline in seperate places!! I remember with Connor they did his an hour before they sent us home…not cool, the other 2 I requested it be done earlier so it would sort of heal before we headed home. Best of luck!

  16. Poor Noah, and poor Mommy. I remember when Nate has his procedure done. I was so nervous every time I changed his diaper, but it healed quickly and we were able to move on, but during the time, I know it sucks.

    One thing that worked well for me was using a container of vasoline instead of a tube. I just popped the lid off before I took off his diaper and then I was able to just quickly put some on my finger, instead of wrestling with a tube.

    He’s adorable by the way!

  17. I know two men ages 50 and 67 and did not have this done because their parents could not afford it, they both have had problems and swear they have kept said area clean. The 50 is actually seriously considering having it done now and it will be painful. Intactivists? They seem very active telling others what should have been not done. Those onsies are REDICULOUS. I know it is difficult for you but it will heal quickly, hopefully.

  18. Disclaimer: This post was really supposed to be just an amusing story from our new baby experience, and was not meant to start a debate (although I’m never opposed to the respectful sharing of opinions), but for the record, I don’t have any regrets regarding our decision, a decision that was made thoughtfully by the both of us. I know there are two very different opinion groups on this issue as there are on most issues with regards to babies (i.e. babywearing vs. babywise, natural vs. medicated childbirth, etc), and I respect both.

    And, Noah is feeling MUCH better in the past week – he seems to be completely healed and perfectly fine down there!

  19. Interesting… another hidden cultural difference. I’m pretty sure the majority of New Zealand and Australian men are intact and have no problems with it at all. I’d be interested to know if it’s just an American thing, or if it’s more common in other countries such as the UK…

    (Just did a quick Google – it’s more common in NZ and Aussie than the UK, who knew?) :)

  20. Poor Noah! I don’t remember having any trouble with Jackson’s little manhood. We didn’t have to do anything to it. It had some sort of plastic ring thingy around “it”, and after a few days it just fell off. Have you thought about getting a little tub of vaseline and using a q-tip instead of the tube? Just a thought!

    And I’m so glad that I know what I’m getting into this time around in that department! And I’m slightly ashamed to admit that I laughed at this post, but definitely not at Noah’s expense!

  21. Better at birth than at 18 months like we had to do with Eli. Trau-ma-tic for everyone. I’ll spare you the horror story. I actually somewhat regret it now (not because I’m against circumcision. I’m just not sure it was worth it to have had to wait so long). Thankfully, his little wee wee is just fine now! This is one aspect that makes me kinda hope this next one is a girl, though…

  22. This made me giggle. This is the exact thing that makes me nervous about having a boy. I grew up in a house dominated by girls and our son didn’t move in with us until he was 3 so I didn’t have to “care” for this department. Now I do and I’m a little nervous. I told Hot Hubby it’s his job to go with Jackson when he gets the procedure done. Male bonding and all. I’m already having to talk to my girls about “mommy diapers” and why they can’t have pee-pees like boys do. I think this time it’s his turn! Glad Noah is feeling better!

  23. How interesting that there is a name for us non-circumcising parents. I shouldn’t be surprised – there seems to be an -ivist for everything.

    So glad to hear Noah is feeling better. I don’t think there is any way to avoid Mom-Guilt, particularly when we are stumbling, sleep-deprived, in the dark. We can only choose which guilt-inducing decisions we will avoid and then find ourselves knee-deep in another one, completely inadvertently. :-)

  24. Oh, BOY!
    Is it bad that after completely sympathizing with you and this experience (my sweet husband changed E.V.E.R.Y. diaper for the first week of our sons life) I laughed till I cried :/

    And my take away from the comments… all the hilarious names for certain body parts that folks use to avoid saying “it”! HA. “Mr. Winky” doesn’t sound near as bad, at least for now.

  25. I am very thankful that when my son was born all the doctors I dealt with at the hospital & our pediatrician and many others told us that it is now felt the evidence showed it to be an unnecessary procedure. While his father did have it done he was more than happy not to have it done to his son.

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