In general, I am against writing posts about trips after the trip is over – it seems rather anticlimactic to write. So I either write it when I’m there or not at all. However, since there was so much other excitement going on this week besides our quick weekend jaunt to the beach (i.e. Baby Tessa, Blogher, etc), I still have a few tidbits from our trip that I feel the burning need to share with you.

So, forgive me for breaking my own silly and arbitrary principle, and accept this post, late though it may be.

One thing that I always try to make a priority on vacations is to teach my child devious past-times. So Saturday morning at breakfast, I tackled the “shooting your straw wrapper at Uncle Leo”:IMG_1324
You see, I think the reason that more parents don’t teach their children to do mischievous things like this is because it’s been too long since they’ve committed these crimes themselves, and so they forget how much fun they are.

However, I’ve always thrown and/or spit my straw wrappers across the table at Uncle Leo, so it was a natural transition for me to pass on my talents to my daughter.

Daddy, a bit more grown-up than me, watched with bemusement.IMG_1329Funny. He gives me that very same posture/look when I throw/spit my straw wrappers at Uncle Leo.

Shortly after breakfast, Ali was ready for her long-anticipated sandcastle building at the beach.IMG_1332

And let me tell you – if your child doesn’t like walking in the sand, GO TO CHILDREN’S PLACE AND BUY THOSE SHOES. She was completely unfazed by sandy walking, which is a complete turnaround from our last beach trip.IMG_1348
We like going under the bridge to go to the beach, which allows for the option of sun or shade.

AND the option to dive off of the bridge piers, which Chris always takes advantage of:IMG_1365
His splash is like that of an Olympic diver. Barely a flutter in the glassy surface of the water:
IMG_1366Or not.

He asked me to jump with him, and so for the first time ever, I jumped the bridge with him.

I looked super graceful:
Until I got in the air. Then I looked like a floundering whale.
IMG_1385Yes, I didn’t crop that picture closer on purpose.

Ali was at first scared of Mommy and Daddy’s dive, then excited and clapping, then acted completely unimpressed when we got back to shore:IMG_1397

She much preferred to “go fishing” with DaddyIMG_1400
So, the beach was great for all. Except for that half hour after our jump where I had to lay, left ear down, for half an hour to get the excruciatingly painful water out of my ear. But after that, it was great.


I promised more information on these “Skinny jeans” that I bought. I know, I know, they go against all that I stand for. But seriously – skinny jeans aren’t what skinny jeans were last year at this time.

In fact, I’ve been noticing people at the mall lately with these ever-so-slightly flared jeans that were really flattering, because the overall effect of the leg was slimmer. Then I realized that these were the “new” skinny jeans.

Now granted, they aren’t nearly as slimming on me since my thighs themselves do me no slimming favors (QUITE the opposite), but the overall effect isn’t as horrid as I thought skinny jeans would be:

See, they’re not exactly skinny, certainly not tapered, but not all the way to flared:IMG_1429
And since I know that everyone will ask about the non-Mom jeans pocket placement, they fit the requirements of starting halfway down the butt, continuing through the leg, and not flaring out, which would, in fact, make my butt look like elbows:


Back to the trip:

We actually convinced Ali to give the “little boats” (jet skis) another try – I was shocked that she would even get on it after her last experience.

However, I PERSONALLY believe that the difference was the third rider:IMG_1448That’s right: Mommy makes all the difference.

Um, right?

Okay, maybe she’s just grown up a little bit more.

Now, she still rode with a deer-in-the-jet-ski-lights look on her face:IMG_1449

(I REALLY wish I could have photoshopped that droopy booger out of her nose, but such is life. Which, by the way, Chris got the boogers out of her nose last night, and she said “I wanna see!!!”, and when he showed her, she proudly proclaimed: “They’re Mommy’s favorite color!!!!”. Sorry kid. Not THAT color of green.)

Um, where was I?

Oh yes. Although she had the slightly boogerfied terrified look on her face, she never once whined or complained. And she MIGHT have even enjoyed it.

We rode out of the bay and into a backwoods creek, which might have resembled the scenery in the Amazon in the Anaconda movies:IMG_1456

ESPECIALLY when we came up to this rope that looked like it had a dead animal for bait hanging on the end of it:IMG_1464

(We’re pretty sure it was just a rope swing though. Hopefully.)

And then REALLY especially when we rounded the corner and saw this menacing boat wreckage:IMG_1452

I’m pretty sure this IS the boat from Anaconda:IMG_1447

But we didn’t find Jennifer Lopez or Ice Cube’s body anywhere around.

We did, however, take the opportunity for a family photo op:photo

I told you Ali looked thrilled the whole time.

But, luckily, no anacondas. The scariest thing we saw all weekend (and it WAS scary, let me tell you) was THIS awful creature:IMG_1480He was furry….and striped…and HUGE.

I’m pretty sure he was one of those human-eater ants from Africa.

For perspective, I made Kitty stand near him (I stayed far, far away):IMG_1481

Shortly thereafter, she lost that little big toe.

Okay, not really. But I wouldn’t have put it past that evil creature.

And, just in case the green booger story wasn’t enough to make this blog Grade-A Gross, Leo took this picture on his iPhone of Ali rejecting a little-bit-too-big-to-eat-in-one-bite tomato at Sea N Suds:photo7

I think he took that picture in payback for the straw wrapper spitting at breakfast.

For more pictures of our fun on the beach, check out this post at B-Sides.

10 thoughts on “…and Here’s the Rest of the Story.

  1. You look amazing in those jeans! I do have the super skinny jeans and wear them with boots and heels, no flats. I think it makes a difference.

    This post was so funny! As always :)

  2. We have those freaky bugs in our backyard from time to time. What's really scary is that I can put all my weight (and that's a lot) into stomping on it, and IT WON'T DIE!!!

    What was the deal with the Gilligan's Island boat? That troubles me!

  3. It looks like everyone had a good time. I thought you looked great in your skinny jeans.

    That ant is a velvet ant and they are nasty..They are posionous not deadly I don't think unless you are allergic but they should be avoided.

  4. We saw one of those ants in the yard just yesterday! I had never seen one before. we killed it, cause that's what my boys do.

  5. I love Ali's shoes from Children's Place, I wonder if they make them for boys?
    I might have to try the "new" skinny jeans, they look great on you!
    Glad Ali semi-enjoyed the jet ski ride…it's funny how much braver you can be with mommy around :)

  6. Love those 'new' skinny jeans!!! And am absolutely craving some Sea & Suds now that you mention it. I think it'll be a while before any of that though.

  7. It does look like she had a good time on the jet ski this time. And yes the commercial was also good.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *