Today’s Hot Teenage Trend: Geezer.

Okay. I am going to totally step on some fashion toes here. So please, accept the fact that I am certainly no style guru, that this is just my opinion, and, well, just forgive me from the front end.

I have been a bit bewildered by style lately.

Particularly, the style of teenagers.

Because the thing is, the “in” stuff for teenagers looks like stuff my Grandmother would have had in the 80’s.

Let’s start with Toms.

I know, I know. They are giving back and charitable. But can’t we be charitable AND cute?

For those who aren’t familiar with Toms, they are a huge shoe craze with teenagers. They are these strangely unstable looking shoes that look like Keds (the ones with no laces), except rolled in toilet paper:

And pre-dirtied, at that. The above picture is the product picture from the Toms website – and they already look like someone has been trouncing around in the dust in them.

But they don’t leave it at just “used” white as your only color choice.

But I wish they did.

You can get them in horrid-old-man-slippers plaid:
Or the ever-classy Liberace-esque-two-tone metallic sparkle:

And I am nearly positive my Grandmother had this pair in the 80’s – she used to wear them to the Shriner’s banquets:
(Because I remember finding a very similar pair in her closet and being in awe of the brilliant light-creating properties of them.)

(I bet these shoes are good for the environment too, being that they work like a sun and all.)

So the Toms just completely befuddle me. Hate me for saying it, but I find them quite atrociously ugly.

And then, there’s (and here’s where I feel the REAL toe-stepping-on coming now) Vera Bradley.

I will admit that some of the fabrics are cute, and I don’t have a problem with them in general. But what I completely DON’T get is how these are the most ragingly popular accessory for TEENAGERS to have.

They’re quilted, for goodness’ sake!!!

Shouldn’t teenagers be carrying crazy bags like this?
Yes, I know that’s ugly. But at least it’s a young-looking-ugly.

But when I see a teenager carrying a purse that looks like this,
I can’t help but looking behind her to find her great-grandmother that she is kindly helping by carrying her purse for her.

I MEAN – that just screams “OLD!!”

And this one – it should be called “bought at the flea market”:But no. It’s NINETY SEVEN DOLLARS!!!!

And teenagers are BEGGING their parents for three figures of cashola so that they can carry these to their high schools!!

As I said, I am in no way against a grown woman carrying a Vera Bradley purse. If I weren’t so opposed to quilting (just a personal preference), I would not be opposed to carrying this one:

or this one:
But – a teenager??? QUILTED?!?!?!?

As if our kids aren’t aging quickly enough these days.

But then again, maybe aging straight from Tween to GEEZER isn’t such a bad idea. . .

Yes, geezer sounds much better than teenager. I’m taking Ali out to buy her Tiny Toms TOMORROW.
In Oops-I-Spilt-My-Fingerpaints Print.