We are currently enjoying the lovely beaches of Saint Augustine, Florida.

Since a majority of my day Sunday was spent on the sand cuddling a certain charming little someone,  I had plenty of time to take in the sights.

And there were plenty of sights, just waiting to be taken in.

But the strangest sight I saw…

The strangest sight I saw wasn’t the Mom with long blond dreads (that were pretty awesome, really) who had shaved her 6 year old’s head except for a set of long, hot pink bangs…

It wasn’t even the lady with the most literal tramp stamp ever stamped – simply the word “TRAMP” tattooed, in all caps, above her rear..


The strangest sight I saw was a Grandmother making sandcastles with her Grandkids.
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It was…astounding.

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My lack of understanding was only multiplied by the mysterious way the stripes transitioned from horizontal to vertical…

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It might have been the most confusing thing I’ve ever seen.

And the only thing I can take away from this experience is that if Jane Fonda ever goes to jail, at least now we know what she would wear.

27 thoughts on “Of All the Swimsuits in All the World.

  1. is that one or two pieces? Is there riding up involved? I find it oddly disturbing yet I cannot look away. I think its the stripes that is making me stare.

  2. I totally understand what you’re saying, but I think this post is a bit mean spirited. Seeing it in person is one thing, but taking pics and posting them online and laughing doesn’t feel okay. I hope you’ll reconsider this kind of post. Thanks for listening.

    1. Debbie,
      I’m sorry if it came across that way – I certainly had no intention of being mean-spirited. In fact, I tried as best as I could to focus on the swimsuit itself, not the person, by cropping her face out and directing all of my comments toward the suit (using “it” instead of “she”, etc). Writing humor can be a tricky thing at times – it’s hard for me to fully express my intentions in it, so I just have to hope that people take it the way I mean it. However, I never want to come across as mean-spirited, and I do apologize if it felt that way to you. I will try to be more careful in the future!

  3. That’s… uhm.. wow. Personally, if all I could find to wear to the beach was my workout wear from the 80’s, I probably would have opted for shorts and a tank top.

  4. The only thing I can possibly imagine is that she thinks the horizontal stripes make her boobs look bigger, while the vertical stripes make her butt look smaller.

  5. wow. I’d like to know where she found that little gem or if she’s been saving it for decades & waiting for just the opportunity to break it out.

  6. Wow. Someone really should have stopped her. Maybe she was doing some sort of social experiment?? No??? Wow.

  7. the only thing better than seeing that, is imagining what you were pretending to be doing with your phone so you could get that shot…because I’m constantly having to come up with new ways to fake people out so I can get a good shot.

  8. I admit, I’m back for the second look today. Wonder if it European? But that usually involves less, not more. I don’t even know what to google.

  9. Pretty sure this is a work out leotard. Maybe from the 80’s, early 90’s? It would explain the drastic cut of the black crotch area and the shorts. Finding a modest swimsuit is difficult for some people. Jazzercise anyone?

  10. Wow..just wow. So many questions for her. But I admire her courage, self-confidence, and lack of care other people’s opinions. I couldn’t be paid enough money to go out in public in that outfit.

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