Do you love hiking, but just feel so un-sexy when you wear tennis shoes?

Or do you have a hangover-from-the-early-90’s-love for Teva Sandals that is so strong that you wish you could wear your 20-year-old-with-the-frayed-edges-favorite-sandals to weddings?

Or have you just always just had a keen desire to wear thick, wool, hiking socks with stiletto heels?

If one or all of these are true for you, then you’re going to be thrilled: for a mere $330, all of your dreams and wishes can come true, thanks to a fabulous new product, released just in time for you to beg for them for Christmas!

Yes, you can now make your feet smile with Teva Stiletto Hiking Sandals.



(Did I already mention that?)

Meant to be worn with, yes, awesomely stylish thick wool socks pulled up and then scrunched in a way that makes me misty-eyed-sentimental for my Timberland Boots of the 8th grade, these shoes will definitely take you places on the hiking trails.

(Some of those places include ravines, canyons, and on-your-butt-sitting-on-the-rocky-trailbed, but it’s places, all right.)

But no matter where you end up on your adventures in these awesomely bad stilettos, rest assured that they will take you there in the most sexy manner possible.


Because really, there’s nothing that impresses a man more than seeing a girl attempting to hobble in stiletto heels on ground not made for stiletto heels.

(After all, I have spent many seasons of football amusing myself by watching college students do just that – and that’s WITHOUT the hiking trails to complicate matters.)

But these shoes aren’t just for hiking – they’re for looking your best while gardening…

(I fully expect to see these in the gardens of the stars of TLC’s upcoming new hit, Bama Belles, aka The Real Housewives of Dothan, Alabama.)

And these shoes are ideal for heavy home renovations.

…especially looking awesomely stylish when paired with a dirty towel atop your head.HikingStiletto7
Oh – and so that none of you sue me for misleading advertising, I can’t forget to mention the disclaimer that comes with these shoes:

*Not recommended for actual hiking, gardening, mountain climbing, or Phish concerts.”

So there you have it.  I hope that I have made your Christmas list complete, and on Christmas morning, you will be well on your way to the most skanky sexy hiking trip EVER.

Thanks so much to ABDMama for sending me the link to these shoes!

27 thoughts on “A Worthy Addition for Your Christmas Wish List.

  1. BWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA! If I’d been drinking anything, I would’ve just ruined my keyboard. That’s awesome. In an entirely ridiculous-but-I-totally-know-people-who-would-wear-these kind of way.

  2. They look so comfy! LOL! I would have loved to have been at the photo shoot. They probably used the dirty towel to hide the model’s smirk. Gotta show my husband. He thinks MY shoes are inappropriate most of the time.

  3. Oh, those are headed straight to the top of my list!! Thank you so much for showing me these! (sadly, I have a mental list of those I know would in fact love to wear these in the mountains… )

  4. Please tell me you’re really good at photoshop and made this up! oh. my. word. Really? Aside from the fact that I strangely find them somewhat cute (minus the socks)…wearing them hiking? I have officially seen it all. No, if they make some uggs this way for those sorority girls at the Bama games…that would make me die having seen it all.

  5. have mercy…. i saw the style but had no idea tiva would bend to the pressure to look like jimmy chu…..

    i wondered where tlc got the bama girls. saw the ad where one brainiac says it is a misconception that southern women are stupid. it is cut into the kissing a cow scene. good grief.

  6. Ok, if I wore shoes with heels that high I would definitely buy these! :D Not for hiking in, of course, but they would go great with a casual sundress. I must have mental issues. /grin

    For those who are wondering, Teva did not make these — they are a conversion, also known as a ‘hack’ (as in hacker). In other words, custom converted by a third party. Kinda like putting ground effects, spinning rims, and a Nos injection system in your mini van. :)

  7. Oh. My. Word. That is maddness! Where do you find these things?? Those pictures cracked me up! Of course I probably wouldn’t be caught dead in stilletos of any type lest my feet and back and body decide boycott living altogether. But those are hilarious!!! So funny. And probably NOT the kind of photo shoot those models are used to! :)

  8. I felt sorta creepy looking at these pictures. Sort of like porn for hikers and campers.

    I’m sorry, but if I saw someone wearing these, with socks of all things, I would have to pull out the Stupidity sign and lay it on them.

  9. Please tell me this is a joke! I think this must be, can you only imagine falling off of your stilettos as you were climbing those hills, or for that matter coming down. But then again, think of all the opportunities for rescue when you fall and break your ankle. All those cute men . . .

  10. OMG…this is hilarious. I told my husband that these would also be perfect for the last month of pregnancy. He thought I was crazy and serious for a moment.

  11. HIDEOUS!!!!! I’m at a loss for words whiche RARELY happens. These are so gross. Teva+socks+high heels=utter disgust!

  12. This is. insane. and hilarious.
    I thought people were joking when I heard Teva made stillettos!

    The fact that the models are actually wearing thick socks with thier sport heels just sent me over the edge and into flashbacks of our 15 year old selves…

    I had a pair of fake tevas that i proudly wore with my socks, fake Umbro shorts, complete with coordinating bike shorts underneath…. *shudder*

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