As I’ve mentioned a couple of times, my kid is fascinated – no, completely and unequivocally obsessed – with “Yucky Bubble Gum Under the Table.”

And, since Chris and I don’t chew gum, I’m pretty sure that her comprehension of the stuff is that it’s some sort of organic bacterial mold that grows underneath tables that is to be avoided at all costs, or you might find yourself growing the same sort of nasty growth on your underneath.

(Something I didn’t take into consideration when telling her that her Princess, sparkly toothpaste was Bubble Gum Flavored. Anyone need a tube of kid’s sparkly Princess bubble gum flavored toothpaste, hardly-been-used?)

Ali suspects that this very sticky growth that she’s been studying so intently spawned from The Famous Charleston Pole:

IMG_9065

Which makes perfect sense to me.

Being that I’m not a gum chewer myself, I’ve been a bit in awe and wonder (and quite a bit of disgust) at how prevalent YBUtT is. I mean – the girl has NEVER been under a table where she wasn’t able to name me MULTIPLE specimens of the stuff growing under there.

Which makes me spend way too much time pondering…do all gum chewers stick their gum under tables? And I just don’t understand the NECESSITY to do so because I’m not a gum chewer?

(Like people without boogers just don’t understand that sometimes you absolutely NEED to pick your nose?)

Or is there a minority percentage of gum-stickers that are just VERY busy, somewhat like the Gideon’s supernatural ability to leave a bible in every single hotel room?

At any rate, the moment that nearly convinced ME that YBUtT really is something that grows under tables was at our first sonogram.

I headed to the bathroom to put on the proper garments for my upcoming internal movie, and Ali and Chris waited around in the Sonogram room.

Ali stooped under one of the ever-so-important sonogram-room tables to check out the specimens right before I left the room. From the bathroom, I heard the following…

Ali: “EWWWW, Daddy!! There’s Yucky Bubble Gum Under the Table!!!!”

Chris: “No, I don’t think so, honey. That’s not a normal table – that’s a Sonogram table.”

Ali: “Then what is this red stuff under here?”

Chris, bending over: “Oh. Wow. There IS Yucky Bubble Gum Under the Sonogram Table. Who would DO that?!”

(Sonogram tech nervously laughs…which led us to seriously suspect her in the crime.)

And so there you go. No surface that has an underside is immune to this rapidly spreading (and very colorful) growth. So don’t touch it – or your underside might end up with sticky splotches, too.

18 thoughts on “YBUtT

  1. Wow as a former gum chewer ( I try not to chew it now because it hurts my jaw), I am always disgusted by Yucky Gum under the table. It shows a lack of manners to me, but to put it under a sonogram table is a whole new level. I mean it isn't like you can't chew gum while getting a sonogram or something bad will happen. If you have to dispose of it just wrap it in a tissue and throw it in the trash.

  2. As a service project one year, several us decided to really give a good cleaning to the pews in our church. I thought they needed it do to the amount of babies and toddlers who love to chew on the edge when they are teething (and as much as the parents try to stop them, they usually get at least a mouthful in first). I was disgusted by the amount of gum I found under the pews. There were a couple of pews where it kind of made sense (that's where the young teenage boys sit at the beginning of service), but it was under several pews.

  3. I've always wondered that too! WHO does that? I wonder if anyone i know would admit to something like that? Everyone i know COULD be an under the table bubble gum sticker. No one would ever admit to it. Fine with nose pickers…but it's like a nose picker that wipes the boogie on someone's shoulder while they're turned away. Are there really people out there like that!? Haha!

  4. I'm a gum chewer and I NEVER stick gum under the table – or anywhere for that matter. It takes about 5 seconds to put it in a piece of paper. For the love, what is wrong with people?

  5. I'm an avid gum-chewer and I've NEVER stuck a piece of gum under a table or put it anywhere but in the trash. On rare occasion I have swallowed it when I couldn't find anywhere to dispose of it. I think that was more to test the 7 year theory than anything though. :)

    Can't believe you found it on the sonogram table! That's one I've never heard. That is kind of weird that you have to change to get your sonogram. I've had five or six and I've never had to change, just lift up the shirt and away they go. :)

  6. Ewwwww under the SONOGRAM table?!?!?! Kinda makes you wonder if everything ELSE is clean in there? I always threw mine away, but not to sure about my kiddos. Hmmmm….

  7. this post is all kinds of awesome. I can't believe how many tables secretly harbor gum and how funny – yes, sometimes you just have to get that booger. Love it.

  8. Okay, seriously?! The sonogram tech?! Have these people not heard of wastebaskets? Or just swallow it. I have never in my life thought "hmmm, I have this gum, and now I don't want it. Wait, here's something I can just stick it to" Gross! I don't want to see my gum again, and neither does anyone else!

  9. This is not a trait one wants in a sonogram tech, I would think. And the pole photo…blech! I'm thankful my everyday view is above the YBUtT.

  10. So where's the picture of the YBUtST? I can't believe people stick their nasty chewed gum under any table, but a sonogram table?! Come on people, grow up!

  11. GROSS!

    I am a very infrequent gum-chewer, but when I do "indulge", I just swallow it when I'm done.

    My husband is a daily, frequent, all the time gum chewer, and he has to spit his out in a piece of paper every time.

    My dad owns a donut shop here in town, and people stick their gum under the counters all the time. I never really knew that until Nathan got old enough to be running around under the counters. Then I looked, and…ewwwwwww!

  12. Um, gross. I don't EVER stick gum under the table. I'm not surprised that kids do that…disappointed, but not surprised. I am completely shocked that someone stuck gum under a sonogram table. If you're old enough to need a sonogram, by golly, you're old enough to understand the wonders of the modern trash can.

  13. I chew gum constantly. But I don't stick it under anything. I don't spit in on sidewalks,e ither, which I hate when people do. I will either wrap it in a napkin to be tossed or spit it in the garbage. If I am somewhere I can't do either, like a car ride in the middle of nowhere and nowhere to dispose of it…well, then I am guilty of swallowing it…ubt at least I know it doesn't really sit in your stomach for 7 years!

    Perhaps your not chewing it has spawned the fascination…it's an anomaly to her!

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