I wish I were a road bicyclist. It looks like so much fun!

They have cool little spandex suits that always seem to somehow be flattering on them, even though I can’t imagine how they would be on me. Maybe it’s the magic of road biking. Or the magic of the spandex suits. Maybe they’re like those super-constricting-Scarlett-O’Hara-like underclothes that squish your insides so much that it makes you have a 12″ waist (what happens to all the extra inches in those things, by the way? Do they squish up to your head or down to your feet?).

Plus, they go so fast. All I have is a mountain bike, and I KNOW that it doesn’t get that fast. They make it look so easy because they’re going so fast.

How fun would that be? Biking is DEFINITELY my favorite form of exercise, and they especially look like they are enjoying it. AND skinny because of it. Or is that the spandex suits?

I want to go that fast, look that skinny, and have that much fun!

They go so fast that in my neighborhood they often exceed the speed limit, especially down hills. Can they get pulled over and ticketed?

Also, are they supposed to stop at stop signs? Because they don’t.

I’ve seen a TON of people (in cars) in the process of getting pulled over lately, especially in Hoover. I mean, like at least 8 people in two weeks. It’s bizarre. Hoover PD is feisty. I have even seen HOOVER PD staked out on the interstate in LEEDS – miles from Hoover.

Back to road biking. How cool would it be to see a cyclist get pulled over for speeding?

Oh – and I wonder if they make little spandex suits in Ali’s size? How cute would we be in matching helmets and spandex suits?!

2 thoughts on “I Wish I Were a Road Biker.

  1. psst..I’ll tell you a secret. You can wear those spandexy suits while mountain biking too! You want to go fast? Haul your bike up to the top of Oak Mountain and I promise you will go faster than you want! Hmm. now that I think of it you should probably wear some heavily padded clothing over your sleek spandex suit. Just in case you black out on the decent…from the speed…or the tight suit!

  2. I saw the Hoover PD over there, too. A friend said that the ones I saw (the black vehicles marked “Interstate”) are Hoover cops who have sheriffs’ licenses or something like that.

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