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I told Ali that she needed to pick up her puzzle.

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“Mommy, will you help me clean up this big mess?”

“No, baby. I didn’t make the big mess.”

I leave the room.

Ali begins picking up puzzle, while bitterly mumbling, “But MOMMY made a big mess when she dropped Gramamma’s pretty eggs.”

For the record, that happened three months ago.

Not that she’s bitter or anything.


I head to the bathroom.

She follows, of course.

“Do you have to tee-tee or poo-poo, Mommy?”

“I have to tee-tee.”

“No, I think you have to poo-poo. I’ll help you.”

(She sits down in front of me, pulls her knees up to her chest, and starts rocking back and forth, leaning forward, and straining to the point that her face turns red and I’m worried about what’s going to happen at HER back end.)

In a very purple voice, she strains, “Puuuuuush, Mommy. Puuuuuush. Puuuuuuush!!!! You can do it!!!”

(I look at her, amused.)

(She changes the subject, apparently trying to help pass the time…) “So, what have your dreams been about lately, Mommy?”

18 thoughts on “Sometimes, Ali Does the Blogging for Me.

  1. I can't WAIT until she has a blog of her own to tell stories about you. :)

    Wow! Her hair has grown so much. I love it!

  2. It completely weirds me out to hear Sam regurgitate stuff I say. And I sort of do a double-take, like, wait…is that how I really sound?!
    P.S. the part about the dreams? love it.

  3. That. is. hilarious!

    Maybe she'll grow up to be a midwife someday. She's got the coaching part down, and sounds like she's working on the visualization techniques with the whole dream thing.

  4. That was beyond funny!! I needed that today! Thank you, Miss Ali!!

    Ethan has that same puzzle by the way. Maybe they can have a "put the states back together" date soon.

  5. Evidently she not only does the blogging for you, she does the pooping for you, too. So thoughtful of her.

  6. LOL! That is hilarious! K is getting preoccupied with poop too lately. She wants to see everyone's poop. Yuck. I keep trying to explain that it is private and we don't need to look at it. Kids are so funny. :)

  7. oh my word. that is the funniest thing i have heard in a while. i'm still wondering when we can go to the bathroom alone again. i think maybe when they move out of the house. :)

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