Telling Jennifer Holliday Surprising News.

All photos taken from one performance during the finale of American Idol.  If you fast-forwarded through it, you really missed out.

Hey, um, Jennifer?  You do realize that Paula isn’t on the show anymore, right?

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And I think she wants her hair back.

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Oh – and the 1994 Mother of the Bride that you ripped that dress off of?  She’s calling your lawyer.

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Hey Jennifer… you DID know that Santa Claus isn’t real, right?

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Nope, the Easter Bunny isn’t either.

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Nor the Tooth Fairy.

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Hey Jennifer – is that a spider on your teleprompter?

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Oh – false alarm – it was just the reflection of your eyelashes.

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Hey Jennifer – you know that Simon isn’t on the show anymore, right?

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But if he were, he might tell you that you were “being a bit indulgent”.  And to not eat your microphone.

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Oh! Speaking of your microphone, is that a roach on it?

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Yes, yes I think it is.  Or was.  Was it tasty?

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What? What’s wrong? It crawled down your throat?

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And you can’t get it back out??

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Perhaps you should just swallow.  Quickly.

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Oh – nope – here it comes.

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There.  All better?  Oh – just one more minute?

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Oh my.  You’re excused.

Hey Jennifer – You did realize that “The Higher the Hair, the Closer to Lord Above” isn’t really a bible verse, right?

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Nope, and the little girl on Toddlers and Tiaras who, when getting her own hair teased, said “Jack it up for Jesus”, was also not quoting scriptures.

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Hey Jennifer – what are you doing?

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Oh goodness.  You’re excused.

What’s that?

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Yes, you’re right. That does smell funky.

Oh – I think Jessica may have smelled it, too.

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How embarrassing.

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Now now, Jessica. Be nice. Jennifer’s feelings are fragile.

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Comments

  1. Marlene says:

    Oh thank you for blogging about this. I was hoping you would. It was the funniest thing my kids and I have seen in a long time. My 23 year old son and I had tears of laughter.

    I keep thinking about it and getting the giggles. Just last night I replayed the whole thing in my head and started laughing into my pillow so I wouldn’t wake up the household.

    I googled it and was surprised how many people thought it was the best thing ever. I thought it was a screaming wipe out. Some of those faces reminded me of Donkey in Shrek. Jennifer has a powerful voice, not taking that away from her.

  2. wow, looks like i missed a real treat.

    • oh my. i had to go back and watch it. it was quite painful. someone’s comment on youtube suggested to check out jlo’s face at 1:32. funny.

  3. I think the funniest comment I read was from a friend who wrote that she looked like she was ready to eat Jessica. It was such a trainwreck to watch!

  4. Wait! What? Santa, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy aren’t real??????? I’m crushed!

    Seriously, this is hysterical!!!

  5. Kristina Franklin says:

    I thought it was the worst thing ever! Loved your commentary! I need you to explain who this woman is though. I’ve never heard of her.

  6. Hilarious!!

  7. This. is. too. funny. for. words.

    Well done, my friend. Weeeeelll done.

  8. Too funny! Darn I missed it! Hope I can find it and watch it on youtube. Thanks for posting!

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